Film Review #103: Cars 2

How could you, Pixar?  How could you make THIS as a followup to Toy Story 3?  How on earth could you have done this to me?  Well, this day had to come eventually.  In a contest no one wants to be the winner of, Cars 2 is not only the worst Pixar movie hands down, but it may very well be the worst Disney Sequel ever made (and this includes Hunchback 2 and The Enchanted Christmas)  It's clumsy, it's unfocused, it's a cheap marketing gimmick, and it's plot and story are so far out of left field that it confuses me that John Lassetter was the one who greenlighted this.  Was this Disney's evil plan all along?  To force Pixar to make bad movies while Disney makes good movies?  Because it's not working (Frozen aside).  Ugh, let's just get this over with.

Plot: Lightning McQueen is invited to compete in a World Grand Prix, which is being held in Japan, France, and Britain, in order to help promote a biofuel called Allinol which is being plugged by a car named Miles Axelrod.  Though he wants Sally to go with him, she insists that Mater travel with him to the cup, which Lightning begrudgingly agrees to.

While abroad in Tokyo, an American "spy car" is being attacked by evil henchmen cars from an unknown "mastermind" named Professor Zundapp.  He passes his information along to Mater, who is recruited by two more spies under the belief that Mater is just playing the part of a big stupid car.  We also learn that the Allinol could ignite if it's exposed to a high electromagnetic pulse, to which the spied believe that Zundapp schemes to use to ward people off of the new oil and keep utilizing fossil fuels.

What's Bad?: Who the hell thought this film had potential?  Seriously, who at Pixar thought this was the film EVERYONE had to see?  Who even thinks this stuff up?  A spy car movie?  Really?  And on top of that, who would give Cars a sequel before all of the other MUCH BETTER Pixar films?  Cars isn't the worst, but why give it a sequel?

Unlike the first movie, which focused mostly on Lightning McQueen's humility, this one focuses on Mater (Larry the Cable Guy), because...the kids like him, I guess.  He's not only twice as annoying in this one, but when he's put alongside a great actor like Michael Caine, it's only a recipe for disaster.

The absolute worst part of this movie is the "twist ending".  I'm not going to give it away (hey, if I had to suffer through this movie, you should too), but let's just say the person who is fronting this whole scheme to stop biofuel is quite literally the last person you'd expect.  And it doesn't even make it a nice twist.  Instead, it will leave you scratching your head in absolute confusion.  It makes so little sense that it may actually kill the twist endings in movies forever.

What's Good?: It didn't assassinate Pixar's credibility.  Nope, we'll deal with that atrocity a little later!  It just hurt it a bit.

Overall: This is the first Pixar film that will get a failing grade.  Simply astonishing that an animation company responsible for some of the greatest animated films of all time would create this!  This film is the perfect example of a franchise killing sequel, something Hollywood is become really good at.

Final Grade: 45, or F

Next Review: Brave
Then: Monsters University
Later: Planes/ Planes: Fire and Rescue
Also: An In Depth Look at Phase III in the MCU (post-Age of Ultron)
Finally: Antz