Film Review #114: Descendants

Ordinarily, I wouldn't review a TV Movie for this site, and I especially hope to avoid any and all Disney Channel Original Movies, because more often than not, they tend to not be original at all and borrow from tired and used cliches that even Hollywood is sick of.  But I chose to make a specific exception for the movie Descendants, which in a fabulous stroke of 90 minutes, manages to demonstrate every single solitary thing that is wrong with not only Disney Channel, but also the Walt Disney Company in general.  Once again, the people involved are on the threshold of a groundbreaking idea, but because of the restrictions they give themselves alongside the poor Disney Channel style acting from the leads and the Villains, combined with mediocre music, extremely odd costume designs, wooden characters, and managed to ruin almost an entire franchise to the point where I almost trashed every thing in my life Disney-related that was involved in this.  It is THAT bad.

Plot: After the marriage of Belle and the Beast (who is still without a name), the couple unites the fairy tale kingdoms of old into one kingdom called Auradon, while banishing the multitude of Disney Villains to a slum-like island to suffer for their crimes without the ability to wield magic.  This prompts four of the Disney Villains to unite: Cruella De Vil, The Evil Queen, Maleficent, and Jafar, all whom breed their children with the bitter hatreds that they have towards all things good and pure.  Their children, Carlos, Evie, Mal, and Jay, are all invited to attend a boarding school by the son of Belle and the Beast, Ben, who hopes to extend an olive branch to the foe's children.  Maleficent chooses to take advantage of the situation and have their children steal the wand of the Fairy Godmother and free the remaining villains from their prison.

The villainous children all attend the school while plotting to steal the lamp and undergo almost every single "High School Movie" cliches, such as the popular boy falling in love with the loner girl (Mal), the pretty girl (Evie) falling in love with a geek, the aggressive teen taking on sporting events (Jay), and the scrawny kid becoming a hero in the big game (Carlos).  The more they interact with the kids at the school (who are all descendants of the Disney Characters), the more the villainous kids begin to question if their parents are worth the effort.

What's Wrong?: Where do I begin?  I guess I have to start with the thing that turned out worst, and that was Mal.  Until the halfway point, Mal was the best thing in this movie.  She was manipulative, took advantage of every situation, and aspired to be as feared and hated as her mother was.  But as soon as she used a love potion on Ben, it all went down hill.  No longer was she the badass girl that could do no right.  Now, she was a Disney Princess who dressed like a goth chick.  She sang songs about not wanting to be bad and wanting to be accepted, falls in love with Ben, and even decides to stand up to her mother.  Why was all of this necessary?

Simple storytelling logic would make Mal out to be someone who didn't want attention and wanted to lurk in the shadows.  Perhaps because she is so defensive, Ben would want to try to lower her defenses and get to know her, but she continues to resist, until having to choose between her loyalty to her mother and her friendships with her new friends.  But instead, we get the typical Disney Princess formula with no twists or turns at all.

I also have to comment on the Disney Villains, all of whom are absolute shells of their former selves.  Putting aside the fact that Cruella De Vil was chosen as a villain over someone like Ursula, Lady Tremaine, Dr. Facilier, or Mother Gothel, all of whom had stories that took place in Fairy Tales, the villains are all shells of their former badass selves.  The Queen is only obsessed with outer beauty, Cruella hates animals, Jafar is greedy, and Maleficent has been watered down so much that she is pretty much just Ursula mixed with that dumb doctor from Phineas and Ferb.  Of all of the villains chosen, Maleficent was probably the LEAST theatrical.  Her lines and persona were more of a Shakespearean angle than a musical theater angle (where Jafar and Ursula could be found), and since this is a musical, shouldn't you pick a theatrical villain over a Shakespearean?  Maleficent singing is comparable to Batman doing a tap dance routine, or Spider-Man being on broadway.

There is also a social problem that I observed while watching this film.  That is this notion that people are just inherently evil and all who are like this deserve to suffer and all the innocent and nice people of the world should be praised and rewarded.  My problem with this is the fact that all of the children and even some of the actual characters who are supposed to represent this notion are stuck up, snobbish, preppy turds that really don't deserve respect.  If this movie could tell me why I'm supposed to root for any of these characters to become good when the people who are supposed to be "good" are stuck up, arrogant, and completely inept, and why I shouldn't root for the bad guys (WITHOUT TELLING ME THAT IT'S JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE EVIL) I would seriously appreciate it.  I cannot bring myself to root for the forces of good because they are what I described above and if I cannot root for the villains for anything outside of nostalgia, who the hell am I rooting for?

Plus, the music is obnoxious.  My close friend Deetzy described this movie to me as "High School Musical meets a Renaissance Faire", and I didn't believe her at first, but it really was.  None of the songs are tolerable by any means and don't even properly represent these characters.  The song "Rotten to the Core" is supposed to describe the little hell spawns as absolutely irredeemable, but we obviously know Disney is not that ballsy.  They can't even do original Classic Disney Songs right.  I swear when they performed that hip hop version of "Be Our Guest", Howard Ashman rolled over in his grave.

The costumes are also distracting, chewing out almost all of the scenery and scenes all the time.  We're unable to immerse ourselves in these worlds because none of our main characters dress like actual humans do.  Seriously, look at those costumes above for a minute.  Would any reasonably minded person dress like that?  This isn't the Mushroom Kingdom, it's a prep school damnit!  Do these kids really evoke the Disney Villain personas so poorly that the feel the need to have them dress exactly like their parents or their parents after overdosing on drugs?  WHY DOES THE QUEEN'S DAUGHTER HAVE BLUE HAIR?  WHY IS MAL'S HAIR PURPLE?  WHY DOES JAY ACT MORE LIKE ALADDIN THAN JAFAR?  AND WHY IS CARLOS WHITE AND HIS MOM BLACK WITHOUT ANY SERIOUS EXPLANATION?  CRUELLA DE VIL WAS THE PASTIEST DISNEY VILLAIN THIS SIDE OF FROLLO, YET SHE'S BLACK NOW?

I have one last thing to gripe about.  This shitty film has something in common with another shitty TV Movie made by another channel: The Fairly Odd Parents: Grow Up, Timmy Turner!  We'll be talking about that festering abomination at some point, but the characters act so over the top and obnoxious, that the main complaint was why on earth was this not animated?  The climaxes of both these movies are so fake and disgusting that I wonder why did they not make these films animated?  Apparently, Disney figured this out and has since made animated shorts that would have made this film at the very least tolerable.  Plus, you probably could have hired those voice actors on the cheap.  Hell, Susan Blakeslee voices Maleficent, the Queen, and Cruella De Vil in most Disney products now, and Jonathan Freeman is STILL portraying Jafar twenty years after he first did,  You could have made it a musical, even a crappy High School Musical, but it needed to be animated for it to have any relevance to the original stories.

What's Good?: Hopefully, it will fade into obscurity and never be mentioned again...

Overall: Disney XD may be slowly turning the corner towards relevancy with big hit TV Shows like Gravity Falls and Star vs The Forces of Evil, but this proved to me that Disney Channel is dead and in need of a seance.  This network once provided people with family entertainment that could be enjoyed by boys, girls, teenagers, and adults alike.  But now, I can say without a doubt that the channel is pandering to toddlers and teenage girls.  No one else would find this remotely entertaining.  And if Descendants is not the perfect metaphor for a fallen star, I don't know what is...

Final Grade: F -

Chapter 11 (RIKU): New Orleans

        Previously in Kingdom Hearts III: Riku began his own journey to once and for all quell the dark forces of Master Xehanort and Maleficent in the hopes of preventing an apocalypse of epic proportions known only as the Keyblade War.  Riku was personally tasked by Master Yen Sid and King Mickey to keep a close eye on his best friend Sora, as they fear Master Xehanort will use him to access unlimited power.  Though he has faith in Sora, he knows from experience how influential both Xehanort and the darkness can be.

       Travelling to his first world, Riku came across a group of galactic peace keepers known as the Space Ranger corp, who struggle to battle the forces led by the Evil Emperor Zurg.  Teaming up with legendary Space Ranger Buzz Lightyear, the duo learned that Maleficent and Zurg had joined forces to corrupt all of the free minds in the Galaxy through the use of an almighty artifact known only as the Unimind.  Buzz learned to trust his new friends and teammates, and together, he and Riku put an end to the evil empire led by his sword enemy...

      Joining forces with his close friend Kairi, Riku next ventured to the nonsensical world of Wonderland to rescue Alice, who had been captured by unknown force and is vital to the protection of the worlds as a Princess of Heart.  Upon locating her, they discovered that the forces of Xehanort had emerged and sought to vanquish the Princesses and unleash insurmountable darkness on the world.  Though he and Kairi disposed of the legendary Jabberwocky, Riku was too late to save the bulk of Wonderland from falling into a void of darkness created by the Heartless.  

      Despite this falure, Riku pressed on to his next world.  Deep in the heart of a jungle, Riku encountered a boy named Mowgli and his protective panther friend named Bagheera.  While Bagheera hoped to get Mowgli to go to a man village for his own safety, the boy proclaimed that he could live in the jungle, even if it meant surviving the wiles of the sinister snake Kaa or the vengeful tiger Shere Khan.  Riku and Mowgli came across a laid back bear named Baloo and after seeing a strong friendship grow between them, he and Bagheera decided it was best he remain with the bear.  

     But Riku's fears began to realize themselves when he encountered a dark being known only as Vanitas, who claimed he was the embodiment of the darkness growing in Sora's heart.  A ruthless battle resulted in Riku's victory, but the mere existence of Vanitas leaves Riku's heart in doubt, even with the assurances of Sora.  Determined to figure this out, Riku seeks the council of Mickey back in Disneyland...

Chapter 11: New Orleans

        Riku's boat arrived back in Adventure Land a few minutes later.  While he was more than certain that Sora was capable of not only fending off the darkness, but also repelling Vanitas or Xehanort, he was still concerned about Vanitas.  He needed to learn more about this sinister new threat that stood in his and his friend's way.
        As he returned towards the entrance to New Orleans Square, he was immediately approached by Mickey, who wore a worried look on his face.  Donald and Goofy, the King's court magician and Captain of the Guard and some of Sora's closest friends, stood by their King's side.  "Gosh, I sure am glad to see you, Riku.  I may need you to hold down the fort, for a while."
        "Mickey, I need to talk to--"
        "Please, Riku.  I need to go check on Kairi and go meet with Master Yen Sid.  Would ya mind looking over everything here?"
        Riku shook his head.  "Wait a second, Mickey.  I need to ask you a few questions."
        Mickey sighed.  "Would ya cut to the chase, please?  I need to get going."
        Riku nodded.  "Does the name Vanitas mean anything to you?"
        Mickey's jaw nearly fell to the neatly paved road he stood over.  "Vanitas?  Where did ya hear that name from?"
        "I didn't hear it anywhere" Riku answered bitterly.  "I fought with him in the Jungle world."
        Mickey shook his head.  "That's impossible.  Aqua and I took care of him when he tried to..."  Mickey cleared his throat.  "Riku, after we get as many of the Princesses here as possible, I need you to find both Sora and Kairi before anything else like this happens.  If something were to--"
        Donald patted Mickey on the shoulder.  "Don't worry, Your Majesty!  We'll take care of Disneyland while you're gone."
        Goofy saluted the King.  "And besides, don't Sora, Riku and Kairi need to go to as many worlds as possible?"
        Mickey sighed.  "I guess you're right, guys.  But I need to go see Master Yen Sid, immediately.  How am I gonna--"
        "What am I, chopped liver?" called a voice from a distance.  Still clad in his former Organization XIII robe, Lea walked onto the scene and addressed Mickey.  "I can handle things around here.  I could use a break anyway.  You go and see ol' Yen Sid, while Riku and the dynamic duo here can go and check on the other worlds."
        "Gosh, I don't know, Lea" Mickey thought aloud.  "Are ya sure you can handle things here?"
        "You worry too much, Mickey" Lea scoffed.
        "And you won't run off if Xehanort attacks?" Riku asked slyly at Lea.  Though he was grateful to Lea for his timely rescue of Sora from The World That Never Was, he still didn't trust Lea, or his Nobody counterpart, Axel.  And Lea hadn't done much other than that to gain trust or friendship from Riku's end.  Yet it seemed, he didn't seem to care one way or another if Riku cared about him.
        "I'm still here, aren't I?" Lea mockingly asked Riku.  "Don't worry about this place.  I'll look after the Princesses and the worlds.  Don't you guys have missions to go on or something?"
        "Don't forget that you aren't a Keyblade Master, yet" Riku reminded the brash rogue.
        "And you haven't been one long enough to doubt me, Riku" Lea snidely replied.
         "Touche."
        "Well, I'm sure you two will figure this out" Mickey chimed in.  "But I gotta go check in with Yen Sid and go see how Kairi's doing.  I'll be back as soon as I can."  With that, Mickey darted back towards Fantasy Land.
         Lea rolled his eyes.  "Sheesh.  What does a guy have to do to get some respect around here?"  Not waiting for Riku or the others to answer, Lea walked away after Mickey.
         Riku sighed.  "Well, I guess I'd better get going, too.  There are still more worlds out there that need out help.  And with Kairi and Sora already busy, I'm going to need to work a little harder for this."
         Goofy nodded.  "Yup and we're coming with ya" he spoke happily.
         Riku shook his head.  "That's not what I meant, guys."
         Donald laughed.  "If Sora is busy, then we need to help you out, Riku."
        "It's what Sora would want us to do" Goofy explained.
        "But I--I mean it's--oh well" Riku sighed.  "I guess there's no arguing with you guys, especially if you run on Sora logic."
         Donald nodded.  "It's not too hard to figure out."
         "Even the King's given up on that" Goofy added.
         Riku looked towards a large poster that hung over one of the doors, advertising for a Mardi Gras parade happening soon.  "That's an oddity if I ever saw one.  Guess that must be the next world.  All I ask is if you guys are going to tag along, try not to slow me down."  Riku hurried off towards the Mardi Gras poster with Donald and Goofy galloping after him.

New Party Member: Donald

HP: 45

MP: 120

Friendship: 70
Weapon: Mage's Staff (STR +2, MAG +2)
Armor: N/A
Accessories:
Mystic Earring (MAG +3, AP +4)
Items:
x1 Potion
x 1 Ether

Abilities:

Firagun: Unleash a lethally powerful Fire type attack (Costs 10 MP)

Blizzagun: Unleash a powerful Blizzard type attack (Costs 10 MP)

Thundagun: Unleash a powerful Thunder type attack (Costs 10 MP)

Aerogun: Unleash a powerful Aero type attack (Costs 10 MP)

Zero Gravigun: Suspend all enemies in air (Costs 10 MP)

Stopza: Seize all Time activities in battle for an extended period (Costs 12 MP)

Curagun: Restore all health of opponents and cure them of all ailments (Costs 99 MP)

Magic Boost: Boost the power of all Magic Attacks and Defense Spells

Leaf Bracer: Allows Cure to be cast even while under attack

Shell: Halve the Damage taken by Magical attacks when HP is low

Item Boost: Boost the healing effects of all items on the field

Draw: Draw in nearby orbs

Lucky Lucky: Increase the drop rate or rare items by enemies

New Party Member: Goofy

HP: 50

MP: 100

Friendship: 70

Weapon: Knight's Shield (+2 STR)

Armor: Knight's Armor (+4 DEF, +1 STR)

Accessories: N/A

Items: x3 Potions

Abilities:

Goofy Turbo: Rush at enemies and send them directly at Sora (Costs 10 MP)

Goofy Tornado: Spin around, damaging opponents (Costs 10 MP)

Goofy Charge: Charge forward and stun attacked enemies (Costs 10 MP)

HP Gift: Give Up All MP to give all friends 30 HP

Berserk: Boost Attack when HP is Low

Item Boost: Boost the healing effects of all Items on the field

Second Chance: Ensures 1 HP remains after taking intense damage

Once More: Ensures 1 HP remains after taking damage from a combo

Jackpot: Increases the amount of money dropped by enemies in battle

        To say that the new world Riku and his friends ventured to was a jazzy lighthearted place would be an understatement.  The town seemed to act as if it were one giant party.  Parades of musicians, acrobats, dancers, and even simple villagers marched along and the people in the village took it as business as usual.  Riku could not help but question why the whole village partied as though it was a festival.  

        "This place sure is colorful" he spoke plainly.

        Goofy covered his ears with his hands.  "Yeah, a-hyuck.  And loud too."

        "This place doesn't seem to be worried about the Heartless" Riku remarked, acknowledging how all of the people simply danced away their troubles.  Save for one woman, who hopped off of a trolley and hurried past Riku, bumping into him.  

        "Oh, I'm so sorry" she said in passing as she dashed down the street towards a cafe of some kind. 

        "I guess not everyone has that party life" Donald said as he watched the woman vanish into the cafe.  "But there doesn't seem to be any Heartless here.  Do you think this world really needs us?"

        Riku crossed his arms.  "I've got a question, and feel free to mock me for this.  But what would Sora do here?"

        "Gawrsh, Riku" Goofy scratched his head.  "Where did that come from?"

        "Sometimes" Riku laughed, looking around at the party atmosphere, "I wonder how Sora could just go around to all these worlds and be so cheery all the time.  Does he just enjoy himself like this?"

        "Pretty much" Donald answered.  "He'll take problems seriously, but he would love a place like this."

        "He does know how to let it loose and have fun" Riku grinned.  All this time, I called Sora a slacker and a lazy bum.  Kairi too.  But is this just them enjoying seeing the worlds?  I know I was just like them for a long time.  But now, I can't seem to have too much fun.  

        Riku looked down the street and finally saw what he'd been expecting to see.  A young blonde haired woman and a big well dressed man were surrounded by creatures that lurked on the ground like the Heartless.  "What are they, Daddy?"

        "I can't say, Sugar" the man answered his daughter.  "I just know I didn't approve of no monsters for this year's Mardi Gras!"

         Riku looked to Donald and Goofy.  "Ready?"  When Donald and Goofy gave him a thumbs up, Riku dashed foward and cut through two of the dark demonic creatures, who were cutting off the two local's only escape route.  "Go for cover!  We can handle this!"  

         The man and young woman slipped away and allowed Riku and his friends to take charge.

Defeat All of the Heartless!

        Riku sighed as the Heartless all dissipated.  But before he could enjoy his moment of peace, he was hoisted into the air by the big man and hugged.  "What the--?"

       "Thank you so much, my boy!" the man spoke in a Deep Southern accent.  "Those creatures have started coming out in droves around here.  At least someone can deal with them in time for Mardi Gras."

        "Mardi Gras?" Riku asked, hoping the man would drop him in time for him to breathe again.

        The man looked at Riku as though he were insane and dropped him to the ground.  But then he took another close look at Riku and nodded.  "You must not be from around here, son.  Almost everyone here in New Orleans knows about Mardi Gras.  It's the biggest celebration we have in these parts, my boy.  And each year, yours truly, hosts the party as the Mardi Gras King."

        "Sounds like a lot of fun" Riku remarked.

        "If only" the man sighed.  "We've got our fair share of problems here in New Orleans.  We may be a nice community, but there's still a lot for us to do before the celebrating begins.  And I've got my hands full with my daughter running around and--"

        "DADDY" the young woman screamed, shoving a newspaper into her father's hands. 

        "What is it?  Can't you see I'm--?"

        "But it's a prince, Daddy!  An actual prince here in New Orleans!  Just like you said it would happen!"  Before her father could read the paper, she ripped it from his hands and hugged it tightly.  "Oh, if only I could marry myself a prince!"

        "Darling, I already got you the biggest chateau in Louisiana.  You want a Prince on top of that?"

        "It's Prince Naveen!" the girl argued.  "We've got to get him to come to our party tonight!"

        The man sighed.  "Of course, Charlotte.  I've already spoken with the King and Queen of Maldonia and they think you two meeting is a good idea.  But, it may have to wait, sugar.  With all of these uh--uh--what are these things called, son?"

         "Heartless" Riku responded.

         "With all them Heartless about, it won't be easy to have a party.  I think I might cancel it."

         "Cancel the party?" Donald asked in astonishment.  

         "It's not like those creatures will just go away in time" the man answered.

         "But what about these boys?" Charlotte asked desperately, wrapping her arms around Riku's left arm.  "Daddy, you just saw them taking care of those monsters!  They can come and watch over us!  Please, Daddy?  This may be my one chance to meet my dream prince?"

          The man sighed and looked to Riku and his friends.  "I know this may be a bit crazy, considering we just met, but would ya mind being security to my party?  I can pay you, of course."

          "We need to have an internal discussion" Riku replied, pulling his arm away from Charlotte.  He huddled Donald and Goofy briefly to talk this over.  "We're not considering this, are we?"

          Goofy and Donald looked at each other.  "Well" Donald chimed in, "we don't get to party too much with all that's going on.  Besides, they might need us in case a bigger Heartless shows up."

          Goofy looked to Riku.  "And I'm sure these people are nice."
          Riku sighed.  "I don't know" he whispered.

         Donald snickered.  "Sora would do it!"

          Riku shook his head, though a smile appeared on it.  He rose past Donald and Goofy and looked to Charlotte and her father.  "We'll do it.  We just have a couple of questions for you."
          Charlotte squealed and giddily raced down the street.  Her father nodded.  "And I'd be happy to answer them over some breakfast.  I know this little place down the street that has the best beignets this side of the Mississippi!  And I'll get some for all of us!  It's just down the street boys.  I'm Eli La Bouff."

          "My name's Riku" Riku added.  "This is Donald and Goofy."

          "The pleasure is all mine!  Now, to get us some breakfast!"  Big Daddy La Bouff walked along the street after his daughter with Riku and his friends following.   

           Out from the shadows, a man draped in dark clothing with a walking stick looked out in disgust at Riku and Big Daddy as they walked down towards the cafe.  He wore a top hat with a skull and crossbones emblem and a violet feather sticking out from atop.  "Oh, just great.  No sooner do I get some assistance from the shadows, then in comes some chumps who can defeat them!  The man's shadow came to life and shared the bitter emotions his owner had.  

           "I don't understand what the point of all this is if the Heartless can't even commit one simple act for me.  I thought you told me they'd help, Pete?"

            Out from the shadows where the mysterious man had entered, the big burly assistant to Maleficent emerged, smacking his belly and laughing cruelly.  "Come on there, Facilier!  Maleficent and I promised you'd get all the power you needed here.  If ya need help, why not ask?"

           "Because I can tell those boys are going to be a real problem!" Dr. Facilier sneered.  "They take out Heartless like it's a sport to them!"

          "They've been a pest that needs exterminating for a long time" Pete grumbled.  "Especially the two doofuses.  But the power of the Heartless grows stronger with every place we venture to.  Maleficent is not one who gives up too easily, you know."

         "And how do you expect me to get what I want if they are here at all?"

         "You just leave that loser brigade to me!" Pete sneered.  "You just focus on setting loose all the Heartless we've given you and turning that La Bouff into one, then all the power in this world is yours!"

          Dr. Facilier looked down the street as Riku vanished and grinned.  "I do have a couple of tricks up my sleeves that should give even those chumps a run for their money.  But I got my eyes on a much bigger prize."  Facilier took out a newspaper from his hat and opened it for Pete to see.  The picture atop it was that of Prince Naveen of Maldonia.  

           

Chapter 10 (KAIRI): Proving Yourself

Chapter 10: Proving Yourself

        Kairi burst through the doors leading to the main hall of the King's Palace and found a tall thin man with a monocle cowering in fear and surrounded by four Large Body Heartless.  "Oh dear!  Where are those infernal guards?"

        Kairi jumped past the man and angled her Keyblade into a defensive stance.  "Take cover, sir!  I can handle them!"  

       "But you're just a child" the man called to her.

       "Run while you can!" Kairi reiterated, blocking a punch from one Large Body with her blade.  The man reluctantly nodded and ran into the shadows.  Kairi focused her attention on the Large Bodies and her focus became pure.  

       

Defeat All of the Heartless

Battle Theme: Dance to the Death

GET BONUS:

Kairi Learned Shock Surge

        As Kairi disposed of the last Heartless, the man hurried to her side.  "Please, you must help us.  A man in a black hood has infiltrated out castle and absconded with the Prince and Princess.  If anything were to happen to the Prince or Cinderella, the King would have my head."

       Kairi shook her head.  "You'd have more to worry about if Cinderella gets hurt, I can assure you that.  Where are they?"

      The Grand Duke pointed up the staircase towards the ballroom.  "The hooded man has sealed himself and the others in the ballroom, with monsters and all sorts of terrors at his command.  Please!  You must rescue them!"

     Kairi nodded.  "Of course!"  With that, she dashed up the steps towards the ballroom.  

     As she made it up the staircase, she found the way into the ballroom had been sealed by some sort of wall with a Heartless emblem on it.  Kairi was about to use her Keyblade to open a path, but the wall began to shake violently and rattled the young warrior senselessly.  She tumbled backwards until she fell from the stairs and towards the ground below.  But she quickly triggered her armor and summoned her windsurfing equipment and flew all the way back to the top.  Still clad in her pink armor, Kairi now stared at a goliath monster.  The wall was no wall at all, but the shell of a massive tortoise-like Heartless.  It roared and shot streams of fire at Kairi as it saw her.  

Boss Battle: Torturous Fortress

Shell HP: 600

Leg HP: 50

Leg HP: 50

Leg HP: 50

Leg HP: 50

Head HP: 350

Note: The Heartless is immune to all Fire and Fire based attacks!

Battle Theme: Shrouding Dark Cloud

Get Bonus: 

Kairi: +5 HP

        The massive Heartless fell to the ground and combusted into a mountain of flame, but Kairi had no time to relish in her victory.  She surged with incredible speed on her windsurfing equipment until she shot into the heart of the ballroom.  As she tucked and rolled off her windsurfer and disengaged her armor, she found Cinderella and Prince Charming trapped in the corner by Xemnas.  The Prince defiantly stood to defend his wife, but Xemnas merely grabbed him and hurled him to the other side of the room.  

      The former leader of Organization XIII sneered as he approached the Princess of Heart.  "How I have waited to begin the purge of the light.  How close we come to our day of union..."

      "You're going to have to wait a bit longer, Xemnas!" Kairi shouted, drawing the dark man's attention.  

      "I thought you had gone hiding like a rat" Xemnas mocked.  "No matter.  One Princess of Heart is a victory.  But two is something else altogether!"  Xemnas called forth his ethereal blades and turned from Cinderella towards Kairi.  But before he could reach Kairi, a beam of light shot from the blue and blasted Xemnas towards the wall.  Xemnas slammed into the wall with a loud thud, but he floated down to the ground gracefully.  

       Kairi was shocked by the turn of events until the beam of light shined brightly and the silhoutette of a mouse with a Keyblade appeared.  "Mickey?"

      "Glad I got here just in time" Mickey proclaimed to Kairi.  "I just knew something fishy would happen."  Xemnas landed on the ground as Mickey pointed his own weapon at him.  "Xemnas!  What makes you think you can do these kinds of things to our worlds?"

      "It is what we are destined to do" Xemnas explained.  "Here, in the perpetual planes of light and darkness, we are to rise and gather to forge the great weapon of destiny.  When the lights in the hearts of all children perishes, we shall waken to see a brand new world forged by the fires of the Keyblade War.  Where I failed long ago to gather power for Kingdom Hearts, I will not fail again!  No longer will the forces of light and dark be enemies.  Once we have fought the great war of our time, we shall forge the X-Blade and bring an end to this wasted millennia."

      "As if we'll ever let that happen!" Kairi shouted.

      "You three are in no position to argue otherwise.  And I don't see Sora or Riku coming to your rescue anytime soon.  Here, in this shallow empty room, you shall see the full power of the darkness!  Only then, shall the true extent of our plans be revealed!"  

      Mickey turned to Kairi.  "Take Cinderella and get out of here!  I can handle Xemnas long enough for help to come." 

      Kairi looked desperately to Cinderella, who along with her Prince, had vanished behind a secret staircase behind the King's Throne.  Kairi shook her head.  "I am your backup, Mickey!  We have to fight, together!"

      Mickey was about to argue, but Xemnas struck first, causing the mouse king to block quickly with his weapon.  "Then let's team up!"  Kairi raced forward and thrust her weapon forward, causing Xemnas to vanish into thin air.  He reappeared above them both and hurtled down with his ethereal blades, but both Keyblade warriors dodged the strike.  As they regained their composure, they watched as the ruthless Xemnas called forth all of his dark power and surround the ballroom in shadows.  

New Party Member: Mickey

HP: 75

MP: 120

Friendship: 60

Weapon: Star Seeker (STR +5, MAG +1)

Armor: N/A

Accessories:

Master Ring (+5 HP, +5 STR, +5 DEF, +5 MAG)

Items:

Mega Potions x2, Mega Ethers x2

Abilities

Illumination: Launch Fireworks at enemies, stunning them

Faithcharge: Send out an volley of energy balls

Sea of Light: Bathe the entire area in light, causing great damage to enemies

Curagun: Replenish all HP of all allies and remove any negative ailments

MP Hastega: Magic reloads at an incredible rate

True Mastery: All Attacks do 50% more damage

Item Boost: Boost the potency of items on the field

Second Chance: Ensure 1 HP remains after taking critical damage

Once More: Ensure 1 HP remains after taking damage from a combo

Boss Battle: Xemnas I

HP: 900

Battle Theme: Disappeared

GET BONUS:

Kairi Learned Once More

Kairi +10 MP

Mickey: +15 HP, +20 Friendship

        Xemnas grunted ruthlessly as he clutched at his wounded shoulder.  "You will regret this action, guardians of light!"  With that, Xemnas vanished into the shadows.  Assured he was gone, Mickey turned to Kairi.  "Are you alright?"

        "I was fine all along, Mickey" Kairi exclaimed.  

        "I worry, Kairi" Mickey sighed.  "Without Sora or Riku to look after you, I can't help but want to be there to bail you out.  Call it "overprotectiveness" if you want, but I call it friendship.  I would want to know you and the boys have my back if I need it just like they know I have theirs."

        "I think Kairi did a splendid job" Cinderella chimed in, returning from the secret tunnel behind the King's throne.  "Though, truth be told, I wished her worthiness had been proven in other circumstances."  

        The Prince bowed to Kairi.  "Our kingdom is indebted to you for your bravery, Kairi."

        "Thank you, but I couldn't have done it without Mickey."
        Mickey turned to Cinderella.  "Did Kairi tell ya why we're here?"

        Cinderella nodded and turned to her Prince.  "I'm afraid I'll have to say goodbye for a little while."

        The Prince was taken aback by the comment.  "What?  But, where are you going?"

        "So long as that man and his creatures can get into the castle here, my friends believe I would be safer in another world.  Surely you understand?"

         The Prince sighed, but quickly regained his calm demeanor.  "Very well.  I suppose I will hold down the fort until you return.  Then we can return to our plans for a second honeymoon."

          Cinderella beamed.  "I'd like that very much" she added, before kissing her prince.  

          Kairi turned to her side to see the Fairy Godmother appear.  "There is something I don't get.  The Prince is sad that they're separating, but he'd rather think about their reunion before their separation.  Is that what true love is?"

         The Fairy Godmother smiled and patted her on the head.  "My dear, I'm afraid you will have to discover your own true love in order to understand.  Cinderella and the Prince found each other because their dreams guided them towards one another.  Perhaps one day, you too will find your Prince Charming."

         Kairi nodded.  "Somehow, I think I already have" her face reddening as her thoughts drifted to Sora.  

Kairi Obtained the Dreamweaver Keychain

STR: +2, MAG +4)

Ability:

Increase the Amount of Time Used in Limits

Forged a D-Link with Mickey

Chapter 9 (KAIRI): Taming Lucifer

Chapter 9: Taming Lucifer

       After what seemed like hours in Cinderella's pocket, Kairi finally felt herself being plucked out of the pocket and found herself in another room.  A huge king sized bed covered only a third of the entire content of the room.  There were large mirrors, huge doors leading to closets for the Prince and Princess, and even a special mirror in near the entrance of the room for Cinderella to get ready for all of the socialite gatherings the King made her and her husband appear at.  

      Cinderella plopped Kairi on the table that sat below the mirror and gently opened the drawer.  Asleep in a bed made from yarn and buttons, a mouse in a red cap snored quietly.  He yawned and rubbed his eyes before addressing either Cinderella or Kairi.  As he finally pulled himself out of the dresser, he turned to Cinderella.  "Flinderelly!  Good morning!  Time for Jaq Jaq?  Gotta flurry!  Gotta flurry!"

      Cinderella laughed to herself before stopping the mouse.  "Relax, Jaq.  I do need your help, but if your still sleepy..."

      "Jaq Jaq make a time for Flinderelly" the mouse rejected the offer.  

      "Have you seen the Fairy Godmother's wand?" Kairi asked.  "She's lost it and it's the only way for me to reach my normal size again."

       "This is Kairi, Jaq" Cinderella explained.  "She's a friend from a far away kingdom."
       "Kai Kai?" Jaq asked.  "Always helpa friends of Flinderelly."  The mouse scratched his head for a moment before answering.  "Rucifee!  Rucifee has it!"

       "Figures" Kairi rolled her eyes.

       "Oh, that cat!" Cinderella groaned.  "I keep trying to teach him the error of his ways, but he just won't listen!"

       Kairi raised her eyebrow.  "Wait, you know that Lucifer is in the castle?"

       "Of course I do" Cinderella explained.  "I brought him here.  I thought that if I could raise him better than my stepmother and stepsisters did, that he would change.  But I guess some pets never do change."  

       "Jaq Jaq a fine Rucifee!" the mouse shouted, preparing to hop off of the dresser.  Cinderella caught him before he could.  "No?"

       "We need to remember that Lucifer, be he a bad cat or not, is still a part of our family" the princess reminded the mouse.  "I will find him and we'll be able to sort this mess out before something else happens."  Cinderella turned to Kairi.  "I will be back shortly.  Please don't run off."  The princess then turned and left the room.  

        As Cinderella shut the door, Kairi sighed.  "So much for trying to please The King.  I go off on my first real mission of consequence and I've shrunk to the size of a mouse."

        "Jaq Jaq helpa Kai Kai too?" the mouse asked.

        "I don't want to get you in trouble, Jaq" Kairi insisted.  

        "Kai Kai needa Jaq Jaq!" the mouse argued happily.  

        "But what can we do?"

        "Flinderelly not know where Rucifee hide!  But we do!  Rucifee hide in kitchen!  Takes a food from a cooks!  But monsters scare him!"  

        "Monsters?" 

        "Flinderelly calls them Heartless."

        "Then I think you and I can help each other" Kairi replied eagerly, calling forth her Keyblade.  "I have the power to defeat them.  Cinderella doesn't even know it yet!"

         Jaq looked in awe at the Keyblade.  "That'sa like Ven Ven's!  And Aqua's!"

         Kairi scratched her head.  "Ven Ven?  Aqua?"

        "Friends of Jaq Jaq and Flinderelly!  Terra too!  All good friends!"

        Kairi shrugged.  "I guess the Keyblade really has been around for a long time.  Come on, Jaq!  Let's go teach that cat a lesson or two!"  

        "Gotta flurry!  Rucifee hides when monsters come!"

        "Got it!"  Kairi slid down the dresser and followed Jaq into a mousehole near the door to the main hall.  

         No sooner did Jaq and Kairi emerge from the bedroom, did several heartless surround the duo.  As the mouse shook his head in worry, Kairi stood in front of him.  "Let me handle this!"  Kairi lunged forward as the Shadows prepared to move.

Defeat All of the Heartless!

Battle Music: Tension Rising

Get Bonus:

Kairi Learned Faith Guard

       Kairi moved her hair away from her viewpoint and finally put her Keyblade away.  "It's alright, Jaq.  Lead the way."

      "Zuk zuk, Kai Kai!  Zuk zuk!"  The mouse continued down the path, with Kairi tailing him.  

       Kairi and Jaq quietly crept through the mouse hole in the corner of the kitchen and looked inside.  In the center of the room, lay the fattest, laziest cat Kairi had ever seen.  Trapped under his paws, was the Fairy Godmother's wand.  

      "I guess that's Lucifer?" Kairi asked bitterly.  

      "Bad cat cat!" the mouse shared in her bitterness.  

       Kairi walked over to the huge cat and tugged at the wand, but it would not budge.  Frustrated, Kairi called forth her Keyblade and shot a bolt of lightning at the cat.  Flustered, the Cat stumbled to his feet and looked around for his attacker.  When he saw Kairi, he growled bitterly.  

       Jaq, seeing Kairi's danger, pushed over the broom in the corner that hit the cat in the head.  Despite Jaq's noble intentions, Kairi remained still.  "Give me the wand, Lucifer!"

        The cat growled angrily and slammed his paw down near Kairi, hoping to intimidate her.  She fell back and rolled her eyes.  "I guess we're doing this the hard way!"  

Boss Battle: Lucifer

HP: 450

Battle Music: Rowdy Rumble

Get Bonus:

Kairi Learned Blizzard

       The massive feline seemed eager to pounce once more upon Kairi, but ultimately fell onto his side with the Fairy Godmother's wand rolling out towards Kairi.  As she picked it up, she turned to the cat.  "You know, Lucifer, I'm sure Cinderella could have thrown you out at anytime.  But she sees that there's some good in you.  Why can't you show Cinderella the same kindness she shows you?  If you don't change, I can't see how she'd keep you in the house."
       "Kai Kai no reacha Rucifie" Jaq chimed in from behind the fallen broomstick.  "Rucifee mean!"
       The cat hissed and rolled onto his back.  Kairi stood in front of the exhausted cat and glared at him.  "Lucifer!"  Frustrated, she grabbed the cat's whiskers and rolled his head to the other side.  "Listen up, cat!  You're going to stop bothering Jaq and Cinderella and learn to be a good cat, or so help me I'll turn you into dog food!  GOT IT?"
       Frightened, Lucifer nodded and bounded out of the kitchen.  Kairi nodded contently.  "Perfect.  Now, let's get me back to my rightful size!"  But before Kairi could relish in her victory, she and Jaq found themselves surrounded by a wave of Heartless.  Kairi gasped and summoned her Keyblade.  "Not again!"

        Defeat All of the Heartless!

        Kairi sighed as the last Heartless vanished into nothingness.  "It's going to be extremely hard to fight like this."

        Jaq came up to Kairi's side.  "Not worry Kai Kai!  Fairy Godmother fix this just like she fix Flinderelly's dress!  Zuk Zuk?"

        Kairi rolled her eyes contently.  "Alright, Zuk Zuk."  

        "Let's get back to Flinderelly's bedroom!"

         Jaq and Kairi found the bedroom empty save for the Fairy Godmother, who sat on the bed with a worried look on her face.  Kairi hopped onto the bed to get her attention, dropping the wand on the mattress in the process.  "We have the wand."

        The Fairy Godmother put her hand over her heart and smiled.  "Oh thank goodness you two are alright!  I was getting worried."  She plucked the girl into her hands and waved the wand.  In one fell swoop and a flash of magic, Kairi was restored to her original height.  

        Jaq scurried up the mattress and called to Kairi.  "Kai Kai big like Flinderelly!" 

       Kairi nodded, but her eyes remained fixed on the Fairy Godmother, who's worried glance now focused on the ballroom which was visible from the tower window.  "But we're not safe just yet.  The darkness is still penetrating these walls.  And should something happen to Cinderella--"  Before she could finish, the castle shook violently.  Kairi grabbed ahold of the bed frame while her mouse friend bounced around on the bed.  

        "What the--"

        "Flinderelly?" 

        The Fairy Godmother looked out towards the entrance to the castle, where a hooded figure commanded hordes of Heartless to enter the castle.  "Oh dear!  Cinderella is in danger!  We must find her before those creatures do!"

        "Where is she?"

        "She was looking for you two.  She was headed for the ballroom where the Prince and Grand Duke are."

        Before waiting for more, Kairi bolted out the door and dashed down the hall to rescue Cinderella from the darkness she knew was there to destroy her.