Film Review #67: Kronk's New Groove

Apparently, the audience had grown for The Emperor's New Groove to such an extent, that it was the first financially disappointing Disney Film to warrant a sequel.  Either that or Disney was completely out of ideas and needed to make a quick buck, but who's saying that?  Kronk's New Groove matches the original in terms of it's simplicity in storytelling, and while it misses the easy bullseyes in comedy that the first seemed to hit with each joke, the film is still fairly entertaining in it's own right.  

Plot: Kronk, who is now working full time at Mudka's Meat Hut, receives a letter from his father that he is coming to visit him, expecting his son to be fabulously wealthy and have a family, or at least a loving wife.  Kronk explains that he once had both of those things, making for the introductions to both stories that take place here.

The first, is a story where Kronk, who often visits and delivers food to the old folks home.  He is recruited by Yzma, halfway recovered from her cat poison in the last film, to sell a tonic that would make the old people feel young and fit again, but in reality was just a scam to bring the evil sorceress back to her desired role as Empress.  Despite making a nearly endless pile of money from it, Kronk gives into the goodness in his heart and helps the old folks win their money back and even gives them the mansion he bought as their new home.  

The second, is at the Junior Chipmunks camp games, where he meets and falls in love with Miss Birdwell, one of the other camp counselors.  But when Pacha's son takes the competitive nature of their games too far, Kronk loses the only person he'd ever loved.  

As Kronk's father arrives, all of the people Kronk's kindness has touched decide to try and convince Kronk's father of Kronk's success, but can they hold it on for the whole time?

What's Bad?: The film lacks the seriously funny jokes the first one had, and despite focusing on one of the bright spots in the film, Kronk may be the most uninteresting part of this movie.  If the film was more of a straight up sequel, then maybe I would have enjoyed it more, but the film can't deliver on the goods of the original.

What's Good?: The film at least tries.  It's not like one of those Disney Sequels that just didn't give two damns about the plot and the characters.  Eartha Kitt is still amazing as Yzma and the rest of the side characters are fairly amusing.  Like I said, the film is at least trying to be decent.  

Overall: Fairly decent.  The film did meet my expectations and didn't exactly leave me angry or confused.  If the film was only a bit stronger, then I probably would have had more to praise about.

Final Grade:  C

Film Review #66: Lilo and Stitch 2: Stitch has a Glitch

Before anyone asks, I am not going to review those Lilo and Stitch shows based on the TV Show.  If I ever review the show, I'll talk about the movies then.  But for now, the only sequel that requires my attention is this one.  And, like I said in my Tarzan II review, the next four Disney Sequels would actually be fairly decent.  They may not be worth the money to true blue fans of the originals, but they aren't exactly time wasters for the kids. Lilo and Stitch 2 is an example of this: a well thought out and fairly well written sequel to a surprisingly touching comedy about a little Hawaiian girl and her pet alien.  

Plot: At the start of the movie, Stitch is having a nightmare about turning bad again and causing destruction to Earth. After Stitch wakes up, Lilo tests his goodness level by having him do a few good deeds. Discovering that they are late for hula class, they use their hovercraft to get there.

While at the hula class, Kumu announces that Lilo and her classmates have to prepare to perform at the local May Day festival. Each student is required to create an original dance. After the hula class ends, Mertle insults Lilo, causing them to have a fight, but after taking pictures of the brawl, Stitch forgets to flush the evidence. Kumu thinks that Lilo is not ready for the competition because of the fight with Mertle, but Lilo says that she is ready and "triple promises" to be good. While preparing for the competition, Lilo and Stitch have a hard time coming up with ideas and Nani wants them to enjoy their family fun night. While watching Them! (film clip courtesy of Warner Bros.) on family fun night, Stitch's past comes back to haunt him and he goes berserk in the house. It seems that after Stitch was created, Jumba did not get a chance to fully charge Stitch's molecules as he was arrested by the intergalactic police. At first, this glitch causes Stitch to revert to his old destructive programming, but it will ultimately destroy him if Jumba cannot create a fusion chamber before Stitch's energy runs out for good.

Meanwhile, Stitch's uncontrollable destructive behavior is driving a wedge between him and Lilo and ruining her chances for success at the hula competition. Lilo and Stitch try getting inspiration for their hula, but Stitch keeps malfunctioning because of his molecules. Because Lilo is so concerned about winning the competition, she fails to notice Stitch's glitch and does not understand that the trouble he's causing now is not his fault. She's too busy trying to get him to help her and completely neglects helping him.

Eventually, the two devise a hula based on the legend of Hi'iaka. Lilo gets increasingly mad at Stitch as he ruins their practice sessions. To make matters worse, Jumba is having problems creating the fusion chamber due to the fact that he doesn't have the proper alien technology to build it and has to try building it using ordinary household objects. However, just before the competition, Lilo and Stitch make up and Jumba finally completes the fusion chamber. Then, Stitch has another one of his fits and accidentally scratches Lilo's face; this upsets him so much that he decides to leave Earth, believing himself to be "too dangerous". Lilo finally realizes that something is terribly wrong with Stitch, and in the middle of her performance, she runs away to help him.

As Stitch attempts to leave Earth, Lilo and the rest of the family desperately try to get him back so that they could re-charge him. But Stitch has another outburst, which causes him to crash the spaceship in the Hawaiian mountains. Lilo rides over to the crash site in a mini space scooter, she finds Stitch close to death and struggles to get him into Jumba's fusion chamber. Sadly, she's too late by the time she places him in the machine and Stitch dies. Then Lilo tells him she kept saying how she needed him but he needed her more, and that he's her ohana, and that she will always love him, and then cries, but with her (and everyone else's) love for him, Stitch is revived, leading to a happy ending and the family (along with David who was completely neglected by Nani throughout the film) performs Lilo's hula dance together on the empty stage of the competition. Nani then tells her their mother should be proud of her and a star twinkles in the sky to prove it.

(borrowed from Wikipedia)

What's Bad?: I can't really say that I've found any glaring flaws in this film. The only flaw I have with the film is the ending in which (SPOILERS!), Stitch dies and comes back from the dead.  This becomes a common trait seen in these sequels and while it can technically work here, you'll see me have far more problems with this in the future.

What's Good?: Lots of things in this film are improved.  The lack of a villain is made up for with stronger depth from all of the characters, including Lilo and the aliens that move in with them.  

The highlight of the film, like the first, is the relationships.  In this case, it's the relationships between Lilo and Stitch.  The best scenes are between Lilo, who is training to win the hula competition and Stitch, who begins to worry that his faulty defects are going to hurt Lilo and the others.  You can see the two trying to keep their friendship together despite all of the forces trying to rip them apart.

Overall: The film is a genuine attempt at a sequel, the studio's first since The Lion King II, and manages to match the first in terms of emotional depth.  While the humor is a bit geared towards children, the film is still a family film and doesn't insult anyone's intellegence when they're watching it.  You can see this if you want.  It's pretty decent.

Final Grade: B-

Film Review #65: Tarzan II

Even the great comedic god and guru of life George Carlin couldn't save this stinker.  And while some can argue the existence of all of these putrid Disney Sequels, I have never witnessed a sequel that added absolutely nothing to the original story in any way whatsoever.  At least Mulan 2 added some depth to some of the characters, even if it was minimal.  But this?

Plot: Put somewhere during the events that take place after the elephant stampede and before he grows up, Tarzan continues to be ridiculed by everyone in the Ape Family for not being as fast or as strong as they are (gee, that sounds familiar), prompting Tarzan to run away from home and comes across two thug gorillas and their old mother.  After hearing about a mysterious creature lurking in the jungle called a Zugor, Tarzan encounters the creature (Carlin) claiming to be the Zugor.

The two set out to discover exactly what kinds of animals they are, as the two of them are outcasts for the most part, all while the thug monkeys and Tarzan's friends seek to find the duo.

What's Bad?: The film does not add or subtract anything from the original film.  In essence, it is a highly forgettable film.  Tarzan has no engaging qualities, and Carlin has his hands tied trying to be both a crotchety old man and a comic relief character, while keeping to the G Rated rules Disney has (Eddie Murphy and Gilbert Gottfried also had this problem).

And just like the Phil Collins songs in both Brother Bear and the original Tarzan, none are really memorable in any regards.

What's Good?: Unlike the last few sequels I've reviewed, this film didn't exactly butt-rape the original film in any way, other than adding absolutely nothing to anything.  It's a pointless time filler, but it could be worse: it could be Little Mermaid: Ariels Beginning.

Overall: I think I've made my case for the mediocrity in this film.  Nothing too terrible about it, but nothing halfway decent about the new things in it.  The only silver lining to this film is that the next few sequels don't suck in the same way that these terds did.  And one in particular, exceeded my expectations of both the film itself, and the original.  But we'll get there soon.

Final Grade:  C-

Film Review #64: Mulan 2

You can imagine the amount of excitement in my mind to hear that the only Disney Renaissance film that I didn't like, was getting a sequel.  Mulan was, in my point of view, the most disappointing Disney Film made between 1986 and 1999.  To my way of thinking, the only silver lining was that the people who liked the first movie were going to have a field day with how awful this film was going to be.  Mulan 2 came out in 2005, following a line of disastrous sequels and preceding a few more awful ones.  But, to the film's credit, this film reaches a new level of awful.  Usually, as bad as these films are, they don't generally bring about a mood of absolute vulgarity and hatred among Disney Fans.  I don't know a single person who likes this film, or anybody who hasn't destroyed their copies of it.  I really didn't like this movie, but I give the film a bit more credit than others do.  It, like the first film, does a few things fairly well, but the rest of the film is absolute pig shit.

Plot: Taking place several weeks after the defeat of the Hun Army, Mulan is revered as the great hero of China.  But the only person who seems to be reaping in the rewards is Mushu, who did nothing in the first film, who also seems to be an absolute prick in this movie, forcing the Fa family's ancestors to wait on him hand and foot.  Mulan, who is dating Shang, is proposed to and the two prepare for a wedding in the future.  But, as they find, they are far more different than they had initially believed.

Any hopes for a wedding are put to the side when the Emperor calls them into action once more, to escort his daughters to a neighboring kingdom to be married and form an alliance to protect against the Mongols.  If they failed, the Mongols would rip across China.  As they do, Mushu learns that if Shang and Mulan marry, he'd be out of a job in guardianship.  This prompts Mushu to try and break Shang and Mulan up.

What's Bad?: There is an alarming number of things in this movie that are absolutely awful.  I guess we should start with the hypocrite that has her name in the title.  Mulan, as we all know, is an idealist who believes in progressive thinking over cultural heritage and beliefs.  So, to hear her complain about the Princesses having to be married to men they don't know, is one thing.  It's another thing entirely to have her force her opinions about love onto these poor girls, who know that their duty to China is more important than their happiness.  The Princesses, thanks to Mulan, decide to throw away their obligations to China in order to be with the soldiers from the first movie, even though it means that the two kingdoms would get overrun by the Mongols!  WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU BITCH!  ALL OF CHINA WILL GET OVERRUN BY THE MONGOLS!  ARE YOU FREAKING STUPID?"

The distinct lack of anything worth telling in the plot also leaves the film without a villain.  But it does have an antagonist.  Mushu.  What?  What the F***?  Really?  The movie is so weak that it requires a douchebag to be a villain?
 
Around the climax of the film, the story decides to "kill off" Shang.  Not only did NO ONE think he was really dead, but there are actually people who think the scene is sad.  Shang, the man with the distinct lack of personality, somehow brings an even weaker personality in this one.  WHO GIVES A RATS ASS IF THIS EMOTIONLESS PRICK DIES?

Oh, and Mulan and Shang need marriage counseling!  BIG TIME!

What's Good?: To my surprise, the animation of this film is pretty damn good.  The good thing about these later Direct to Video films is that the animation is actually legitimate in quality.  This film even rivals the original in terms of artistic skill.

As much as the relationships make no sense by the rules of the plot, the chemistry between the Princesses and the Soldiers is actually fleshed out well.  While not distracting from the absolute nonsense of the plot, we do see why the soldiers and Princesses start to fall in love in this movie.

Overall: WEAK, but plausible.  There are elements that work fairly well, but if the film's protagonist is completely different from the original film, what is the point of making the film then?

Final Grade:   D-