Film Review #9: Peter Pan (1953)

I've always been on the fence about this film.  There are
elements about it that are some of the best in Disney history, and then there's elements that either annoy or insult me.  I do see what's good in Peter Pan and I do see why people and fans love this film. 

Plot: In London, the Darling family lives just like a normal family does.  Mr. Darling believes that their daughter Wendy has grown past living in the nursery and should have a room of her own.  He is also annoyed that Wendy has been telling the boys, John and Michael, stories about a boy who could fly and battled pirates in an imaginary land.

That night, Peter Pan and Tinker Bell come to the Darling's house in search of his shadow.  Wendy offers to sew it back on, and Peter offers to take her to Neverland so she could never grow up.  The boys accompany them, as a jealous Tinker Bell tries everything in her power to kill off Wendy. 

Meanwhile, the ruthless Captain Hook kidnaps Tiger Lily, the Indian Chief's daughter to force her to reveal Peter Pan's hiding place.  Peter is able to save her and leaves his arch-nemesis to swim away from the Crocodile that swallowed the alarm clock.  Wendy soon realizes that living in Neverland isn't what she expected and tries to bring the boys home, but Peter is unwilling to help them leave. 

Hook is able to trick Tinker Bell into revealing Peter's hideout and captures the Darlings and Peter's lost boys.  Then, he leaves a bomb that will explode and blast Peter out of Neverland forever.  Luckily, Tink is able to save Peter and the two set off to defeat Hook and his pirates once and for all.

What's Bad?: Well...there are things I find pretty irritating in this film.  For the most part, it involves the stuff and people in Neverland.  The Indians are on the same scale as the Crows from Dumbo and it irks me, mainly because I am Native American.  The Lost Boys could have been like the Dwarfs and have their own personalities, but they're all the same, like Huey, Dewey, and Louie.  The same could be said about the Mermaids, but I do understand it. 

Another thing that annoys me is that from what I noticed (i could be wrong), the only real reason Wendy tries to get the boys to go home is because Tiger Lily kisses Peter and she gets jealous.  For the most part, Wendy forces her opinion on her brothers and at least tries to on her parents. 

What's Good?: That being said, Wendy's character is likable.  She is your basic older sister and she is likable, just like Alice. 

What i really love about the movie is Captain Hook.  He is one of Disney's greatest villains for a reason, because he is hilarious and foppish, while also being menacing and conniving.  Plus, the slapstick between him and the Crocodile is some of the funniest in Disney history, along with Iago's in Aladdin.

The songs are okay and the score is adventurous and upbeat. 

The romance between Wendy and Peter is well done.  They act like how real kids fall in love.  And since i was a kid not too long ago, i feel like their chemistry is just like a kid's would be. 

Overall: The film is well crafted.  It has a great villain and a strong starring cast, but the supporting cast kind of falls by the wayside.  The animation is still good and the music is nice and the pacing is great.   It's a nice film and a decent one at that.  I just think it could have been a lot better.  Nevertheless, it's still a film to watch.  Go see it, if you haven't already.

Report Card

Hero:                              A
Heroine:                         A
Villain:                           A
Supporting Cast:          C
Songs:                             B
Musical Score:               B+
Animation:                    A-
Special Effects:              B-
Theme:                           B+
Story:                             A-

Final Grade:  B+
 

Film Review #8: Alice in Wonderland (1951)

Riding high with the success of Cinderella, Walt Disney and his animation team began to return to several older products and plans, including two of Britain's most well known stories.  The first of these animated films was finished in 1951 and was released to overwhelmingly underwhelming reviews and was a dud at the box office.  Disney's spin on the classic Lewis Carroll book Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass, was universally panned by critics and audiences alike, shattering Disney's confidence.  Despite an initially disastrous result, Walt Disney's thirteenth animated classic, Alice in Wonderland, is now regarded as one of the greatest animated films of all time, and the greatest re-telling of the classic stories of all time.

Plot: Set just outside of London, a young Alice is being taught history by her sister, but begins daydreaming about a world of her own.  When she spots a rabbit wearing a waistcoat and watch, she curiously follows him down a rabbit hole and stumbles into Wonderland, a place where everything is topsy turvy. 

Through an episodic run of pursuing the rabbit across Wonderland, Alice meets with many of the land's eccentric inhabitants, including Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum, Absolem the Caterpillar, The Mad Hatter and March Hare, The Cheshire Cat, and many other bizarre and insane creatures.  Alice's curiosity lands her in the middle of the Queen of Heart's rose garden, where she has to avoid losing her head in the most insane court trial since O.J. Simpson's (Oh Snap!)

What's Bad?: This, like Fantasia, is different when compared to other Disney animated films.  This film is different because it doesn't really have a plot or central antagonist.  The difference between this and another kind of episodic film like The Sword in the Stone, is that this film has a very entertaining musical score and a fun antagonist.  But, like The Sword in the Stone, the film often slows when you'd think the film would begin to build momentum.  Lewis Carroll's books are almost impossible to adapt faithfully into a motion picture.  Just the fact that Disney made this film should give them some legitimacy. 

What's Good?: Alice is Disney's first legitimate female lead, as both Cinderella and Snow White are more passive to the story than reactive.  Alice reacts in this story and is a driving force behind the plot.  Kathryn Beaumont does a good job with what she is given.  The music is well written and the side characters are very memorable, especially Sterling Holloway's portrayal as the Cheshire Cat. 

 The Queen of Hearts is a funny villain, despite not being in the film until the last act.  She reminds me a lot of a spoiled child, who yells and complains when she doesn't get her way. 

The animation is great, but I think it could have been better.  The tone and mood of the animation is dark and not like Wonderland should be.  Most of the backgrounds are either black or dark blue and do not really resonate something like Wonderland should be. 

Overall: I think the film is okay.  It isn't something Disney should brag about making, but it does deserve the title of Walt Disney's Classic.  While I understand why Disney usually never puts the film in the Disney Vault, it is a Walt Disney Classic and while not the best of the 1950's, it is a good film nonetheless.

Report Card

Hero:                       N/A
Heroine:                  A
Villain:                     A
Side Character:       A-
Songs:                      B+
Musical Score:        B
Animation:              B-
Special Effects:       B-
Theme:                    B
Story:                      B-

Final Grade: B
 

Film Review #7: Cinderella

After several years of doing nothing but packaged projects put together to be cost-effective during the War and Postwar years, in 1950, Walt Disney released his first full-length feature film since Bambi.  Granted, there are somethings that Disney couldn't possibly do due to the film's strict budget and very low financial resources left, but Cinderella is one of Disney's better films, primarily because of it's incredible songs and beautiful animation.  Naturally, Cinderella was a huge success at the box office and adjusted for inflation is one of the most successful films in the history of Hollywood.

Plot: A beautiful young woman named Cinderella is forced to become a servant to her evil stepmother and two selfish step sisters.  Each day, she is to scrub and clean after them, give them breakfast in bed, tend to the stepmother's evil cat Lucifer, and care for the farm animals.

One day, the King of the land, who is tired of waiting around for grandchildren, decides to host a ball in which he hopes his son will choose a bride.  He decrees that every eligible maiden is to attend, but Cinderella is swamped with so much work to do that she is unable to find an outfit in time to go.  Luckily, her animal friends create a pretty dress for her to wear, but the stepdaughters rip the dress apart out of anger and jealousy.  Cinderella is about to give up hope, but her fairy godmother appears and gives her a beautiful gown, coach, and glass slippers to wear, but gives her a cryptic warning that the spell will break at midnight.  At the ball, Prince Charming and Cinderella fall in love and dance then night away, but at midnight, Cinderella flees the castle before the spell breaks, leaving behind one glass slipper.

The Prince decrees that he will marry none but the girl who fits the glass slipper.  When her stepmother discovers that Cinderella was the maiden at the ball, it is up to her animal friends to save Cinderella and bring her the happiness she deserves, before the Grand Duke departs from their chateau.

What's Bad?: I guess the only flaw I have with the film is the fact that most of the scenes in the film aren't building Cinderella's character, but more on comic scenes with the King and the Duke and other scenes with the mice and the cat.  This is why I see so many people don't particularly like Cinderella's character in this film, because she is underplayed.

What's Good?: It was the first time in a long time that Disney had a truly evil villain appear on screen that we love to hate.  The evil stepmother could give Snow White's a run for her money.  She is cold and uncaring, but she is so good at hiding the inner monster within, that it's almost terrifying.

The songs are Disney Classics.  "Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo" and "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes" are true blue classics.

The animation is exactly what people think of when they try to remember classic Disney films.  The beautiful ink lines and rich coloring is so meticulously detailed and convincing, that it rivals the animation in almost all of the films made in the 90's.

Overall: The film, while flawed, is still a Walt Disney Classic.  There is something in this film for everyone, and this film is one that should be enjoyed by everyone.  It is a beautiful film and a legend in its own right.

Report Card:

Hero:                              D-
Heroine:                         B+
Villain:                           A
Side Characters:           B+
Songs:                             A+
Musical Score:               B+
Animation:                     A+
Special Effects:              B-
Theme:                           B+
Story:                             A-

Final Grade: A-

Film Review #6: Bambi

This is one of those films that at times can be so good, while at other times can be pretty annoying or confusing.  Nevertheless, it would be criminal of me not to see Bambi as the classic that it is.  Bambi, along with The Lion King, are Disney's coming of age stories.  And while one of these films did the coming of age angle a bit better, the other manages to capture the richness of forest life from the time Bambi is born, to when he takes his father's place as Prince of the Forest.  Still, that doesn't mean there isn't anything in the film to watch.  Far from that!  This film is similar to Dumbo in the amount of emotional simplicity.

Plot: Bambi is born as next in line for the title of "Great Prince of the Forest".  He lives with his mother, while trying to learn what he needs to learn to survive in the forest.  Along his journey, he meets lifelong friends like Thumper the rabbit, a female deer named Faline, and a skunk named Flower.

Over the course of his life, Bambi learns many lessons and undergoes many strenuous trials, which include harsh winters, the threat of man, and being "twitterpated".  Bambi grows up into a stag and learns on the job that it is his duty to guard the forest from the dangerous threat of man.  Eventually, Bambi and his mate Faline have fawns of their own as Bambi takes his father's place as Prince of the Forest.

What's Bad?: The length of the film, at 69 minutes, ultimately hinders any kind of character development for Bambi or any of the characters for that matter.  The biggest example of this is when Bambi's mother is famously shot by Man.  When King Mufasa dies in The Lion King, most of them movie Simba reflects on the loss of his father and the kingdom's eventual fall out of balance.  When Bambi's mother is shot, the film glosses over her death and the rest of Bambi's tutelage from his father and just skips to Bambi's adult life.  I guess it's just my way of thinking, but this kind of distracts me.

What's Good?: Despite this controversial bit of judgement, Bambi is a beautiful piece of art.  The naturalism in this piece is simply stunning to look at.  Even the most cartoonish scenes in the film are still pretty to look at.  I also like the fact that the father is almost never around in this film.  Most of the things that Bambi learns in the film are learned from his mother, a rarity for Disney.

The songs are also very unique in the film.  While the anthem is a traditionally wonderful Disney anthem, the rest of the film's songs are sung by a choir away from the film.  And while I am a little annoyed at the way the death was portrayed, I am happy that this is the first fleshed out Disney Character to actually die and stay dead that wasn't a villain.  This wouldn't happen again until The Lion King 52 years later.

I also love the decision they made to make sure that Man is never seen in the film, but his presence is felt so strongly throughout the forest.  Like in Pinocchio, the villain isn't necessarily defeated.  Man's wildfire destroys the woods, but he isn't around to suffer the consequences.

Overall: While the film does lag in some instances, like most Disney films, the stuff that is good is really really good.  The animation is still beautiful, the songs are well written, and the theme is timeless.  Bambi is considered one of Disney's greatest films and with great reasons.  I just have my personal flaw with it.  It is truly a masterpiece.

Report Card:

Hero:                                    B
Heroine:                              B-
Side Characters:                 B+
Villain:                                 A+
Songs:                                  B+ 
Musical Score:                    A-
Animation:                          A+
Special Effects:                   A
Theme:                                A
Story:                                   B

Final Grade: A-

Film Review #5: Dumbo

 The Disney studios were in extreme financial strains as
1940 came to a close.  Both Pinocchio and Fantasia lost money at the box office, in large part due to the European Market being cut off because of WWII.  Nevertheless, both films cost a fortune to make and neither did the business that Snow White did.  Walt realized that they needed a low budget film that could make a huge profit at the box office.  But in order to grab the audiences attention, the film would need to have an emotional simplicity and a truly deep message while bringing a story fun for all ages to see.  The result was the heartwarming tale of Dumbo, the fourth movie ever released by the Walt Disney Studios.  And while the film doesn't break any technical barriers, the film is an emotional achievement no film they had made prior could achieve, and would only achieve again very sparingly in the future.

Plot: The stork comes to a traveling circus, dropping off newborn babies to all of the circus performers, even Mrs. Jumbo, and elephant who had to wait a little longer for her bundle of joy.  When her baby boy comes out of it's sack, the other elephants are ecstatic, that is until the baby sneezes and reveals that he has huge ears.  The other elephants mock him for this, but Mrs. Jumbo loves her son either way, despite having to deal with her son being called "Dumbo".  When one child goes too far in making fun of Dumbo, Mrs. Jumbo retaliates and is locked away.  As Dumbo is shunned by the rest of the circus, he finds a friend in a mouse named Timothy, who tries to help Dumbo free his mother from jail.

After a failed attempt, the Ringmaster makes Dumbo perform with the clowns, which makes Dumbo feel even more down than before.  This prompts Timothy to take Dumbo to see his mother.  After their very emotional visit, Timothy and Dumbo get unintentionally drunk and wind up somehow atop a tree in the view of several (somewhat racist) crows.  The crows initially mock Timothy for thinking Dumbo flew up, but after hearing Dumbo's story, decide to help him fly.  To their amazement, Dumbo does fly and becomes a legend at the circus.  His mother is freed and Dumbo becomes the gateway attraction at the circus.

What's Bad?:  The only complaint I have about the film is how short it was.  This is the shortest non-package project film, at only 63 minutes.  I guess there really wasn't much more story to tell outside of getting the mother out of her cell, so it probably works.  It isn't the worst short movie that could have been longer (see Bambi).

What's Good?: The rest of the film is just good.  It isn't spectacular like the first three films were, but it also wasn't supposed to be.  The film's highlight is the emotional relationship between Dumbo and his mother.  It was the first time that Disney had worked in a real tear-jerkingly emotional relationship, a formula they would reuse countless times in the future.

As for the rest of the film, which is still pretty good by Disney's standards, it's kind of good but more okay than anything else.  The characters are pretty decent, the songs are okay, and the animation is still amazing.

Overall: The film is emotional simplicity working it's wonders.  This is an easy choice for your child's first movie or for even just a story you all could watch together.  It's a fun film and a truly moving piece.  Well done, Disney.

Report Card:

Hero:                                   B+
Heroine:                              A-
Side Characters:                B
Villain:                                N/A
Songs:                                 B
Musical Score:                   B
Animation:                         A
Special Effects:                  B-
Theme:                               A+
Story:                                 B

Overall: B+

Film Review #4: Fantasia

This is easily going to be one of the most difficult reviews that I will be posting on this site.  The biggest issue is the fact that this is that one in a million Disney film that not only doesn't give the audience a specific emotional response, it also doesn't have a set story, or any dialogue apart from the host.  Does this mean Fantasia is a terrible movie?  Absolutely not!  This film is the pinnacle of art, combining rich and classical music with the beautiful animation of Disney's artists.  The film is that once in a lifetime film that goes against conventional wisdom completely, not having anything to do with any of it's predecessors or any of it's successors.  Kudos to Walt Disney and Leopold Stokowski for making the most original and stand out Disney film ever.

I guess the only way to tell a specific plot is to discuss the various movements of the concert.

Toccata and Fugue In D Minor, BWV 565

As described by the narrator, this piece, originally written by Bach, is basically what the animators pictured in their heads when when they listened to the music.  There is simply impressions and patterns floating in and out on screen completely in sync with the music.  Absolutely fantastic!  A+

The Nutcracker Suite

This isn't your ordinary retelling of Peter Tchaikovsky's most recognizable piece.  The suite depicts the seasons going throughout the span of a year (i guess) while also showing the lives sprites, mushrooms, petals, fish, and flowers in that time.  The only unfortunate part of this is that this is an abridged version of the suite.  Since I love this piece, this kind of ticked me off.  B+

The Sorcerer's Apprentice

The most well known part of this movie, this is the first piece that tells a definite story.  Mickey Mouse is the apprentice of a powerful sorcerer, but he's tired of doing nothing but menial chores and believes that he is ready to be a full-fledged sorcerer.  That night, he steals the sorcerer's hat and uses a spell to make a broom do his tasks for him.  But he loses control of the broom and the magic broom floods the tower they live in.  A great story and a great piece!  A

The Rite of Spring

This is one of the best parts of the movie and one of the worst parts.  It is one of the best parts, because it tells the accepted evolutionary stages of Earth from it's volcanic days until the parting of Pangaea.  The most annoying part is that is goes on forever!  It gets pretty irritating and boring.  The music is still fantastic.  I just wish this was abridged a bit more.  B  

The Pastoral Symphony (Sixth Symphony)

 Rather than go with a boring folklore story about old Europe, Walt Disney does a very creative thing with Beethoven's Sixth symphony and turns it into a day in the life of Greek Mythological world.  Everything from Unicorns and Fauns, to Centaurs and Zeus hurling lightning bolts at the people below.  The music is simply outstanding, and the change of pace for the film after the dry Rite of Spring is very refreshing.  A

Dances of the Hours

Much like the Sorcerer's Apprentice, this is more for the children than the adults, being a comic ballet performed by various animals including hippos, ostriches, elephants and crocodiles.  The music was well performed and the comedy in this number was actually quite enjoyable.  It gave us all the more reason to be excited for a wonderful finale.  A

The Night on Bald Mountain & Ave Maria

If these two were combined in any other movie, we would view it as a very bizarre idea.  Not only does it work here, it works brilliantly here.  The contrasting music is breathtaking.  The beginning with Bald Mountain is simply stunning, as Chernabog, a demon from Hell, reawakens his dead followers and unleashes chaos throughout the night, only to be stopped by the ringing church bells and the choir singing Ave Maria.  This is by far the highlight of the movie, as the contrasting themes and dark visuals make for a stunning religiously powerful piece of work.  A+

Overall: The film is legendary for a reason.  It doesn't need to follow the traditional Disney Formula of a happy ending or a handsome prince wins a beautiful princess.  This is why Fantasia and The Rescuers Down Under are fast becoming more popular with every couple of months.  This film is the Crown Jewel of Disney's experimenting days, but it would be nearly overshadowed by another film down the road, but we'll get there soon.  But this film is in a class of it's own, and with good reason.

Final Grade: A   

What Could Have Been #5: Revenge of the Sith

If any of you out there know me, than you know that I have a fascination with the Star Wars universe, the prequel films included.  I am fascinated that Lucas was able to combine the philosophy and mythological teachings of Joseph Campbell, with allusions to world religions and historical falls of republics and the eventual rise of tyrannical dictators like Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler, and bring about the most fascinating story ever assembled by just one simple man with a dream.

With that said, the prequel trilogy is one of the worst trilogies of films of all time in terms of acting, writing, and generally less than spectacular special effects, proving that Lucas is more interested in telling a story that is visually compelling instead of relying on the kind of writing that brought out such classics as "A New Hope" and "The Empire Strikes Back".  In these posts, I will be focusing on what could have made Episodes I-III not only as good as the original trilogy, but even more superior when compared to such famous trilogies as "The Lord of the Rings" and "The Dark Knight".

 

The film opens to the following crawl:

The Galaxy is on the brink of destruction.  The Republic and Confederacy have

annihilated virtually the entire galaxy in their conflict.  Evil is everywhere.

The person most responsible for the heinous war crimes is the fiendish

Droid leader, General Grievous, who is responsible for the death of nearly

100 Jedi knights in the last few years of war alone.

On the Galactic Capital of Coruscant, The Jedi Council continues the

command of the war, unaware that the war will come closer than they

ever anticipated...

 The film then shows several Confederacy flagships approaching Coruscant.  Led by Count Dooku and Grievous, they plan to obliterate Coruscant and all it stands for.  Several million droids are deployed onto the planet's surface, while Grievous is sent out on a special mission.

In Palpatine's office, he and Jedi Master Mace Windu are discussing a recent victory achieved by Jedi Knight's Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker.  Just then, Grievous bursts through the door and demands that Windu hand over Palpatine,  Mace and Grievous then engage in a lightsaber duel, while the droids take Palpatine away.  Grievous retreats, which forces Mace to launch a desperate attempt to save the Chancellor.  

With the deflector shields up at maximum, no Republic cruiser can get near Dooku's flagship.  With several thousand Clone Troopers dying every minute, Mace and Yoda agree to give out a call to Anakin and Obi-Wan.  The two immediately arrive, having heard that Coruscant is under siege.  

Dooku and Palpatine discuss their plan: Dooku and Grievous are to separate Obi-Wan and Anakin from each other.  Grievous is to distract Anakin, while Dooku murders Obi-Wan.  In a rage, Anakin will slaughter Grievous and apprehend Dooku on Palpatine's orders, and the new Sith will be inducted.

Anakin and Obi-Wan easily fall for the ruse and are separated once they land on the ship.  Obi-Wan arrives on the main deck, where Dooku is.  Dooku and Obi-Wan duel each other, until Obi-Wan is rendered unconscious by Force Lightning.  Dooku then hurls the Jedi out of the ship's window and into space.  Little does he realize that Kenobi's limp body is picked up by a Republic Cruiser.

Anakin and Grievous encounter each other where Palpatine is being held.  Anakin fends off several of the General's Magnaguards, until he realzies that the Chancellor is gone.  In a rage, Anakin goes off to find Dooku.

Anakin arrives in the General's Quarters and duels Dooku in an effort to save Palpatine.  As Dooku taunts Anakin, Anakin unleashes his rage on the Count, slicing the Sith Lord's lightsaber in half.  Palpatine orders Anakin to apprehend Dooku and return to Coruscant.  Palpatine explains that he will have Dooku surrender the Confederacy to the Republic, to which Dooku (as planned) announces over the comlink that he is resigning his post, making Grievous the new Confederacy Leader.  Dooku is knocked out and brought to an escape pod and brought to Coruscant.  

When Anakin learns that Obi-Wan is still alive, he is overjoyed but still hesitant to tell his friend that he had a brush with the Dark Side.  When they arrive, Anakin sneaks away from the ceremony and goes to Padme.  Padme tells Anakin that she is pregnant.  Anakin is happy, preparing to declare his fatherhood to the world, but Padme reveals that if anyone finds out that she is pregnant, the Jedi Council would bar Anakin's upcoming Master Ritual Test and she would be dismissed as the Jedi Council Informant and sent home to Naboo.

Grievous is able to elude custody and retreats to the Confederacy stronghold of Kashyyyk, where he has rounded up thousands of Wookies to act as slaves.  Darth Sidious contacts him, telling him that Dooku has betrayed them and that he requires a new apprentice.

Anakin suffers a premonition, where he sees Padme being choked by a hooded figure wielding a lightsaber.  Anakin fears that it will be prophetic like it was with his mother.  He decides to go to the Jedi Temple to discuss the matter with Yoda.  Yoda only informs him that his premonitions only have a 50% chance of occuring, as all Jedi have them a lot.  Anakin tries to go to the library to learn more, but Jocasta Nu informs him that what he seeks is restricted to Jedi Masters only.

In the Republic Courts, Dooku acts as if he has seen the error in his ways and gives the Senate virtually everything they need to know about the Confederacy, in the hopes of being released early.  But he is deemed guilty and sentenced to 100 years of servitude to the Republic and 3 years in prison.  

At the Jedi Temple, Anakin and Obi-Wan undergo the Jedi Master Ritual to see if they qualify as Jedi Masters.  The test goes on, but Anakin is constantly distracted by his fear for Padme.  As a result, Obi-Wan is granted Mastery, but Anakin fails.  

That night, Anakin is contacted by Palpatine to come to a meeting with him.  The Chancellor informs Anakin that with a new emergency power the Senate has granted him, he is making Anakin his personal representative on the Jedi Council, telling him that he would be working closely with Padme and earn the rank of Jedi Master.  The Council tries to block the move, but Palpatine's new power prevents the Council from having any say in the matter.

The next day, Anakin confronts Dooku in his cell at the Jedi Temple.  Anakin was told by the Council that they needed to know where Grievous was hiding, but Dooku immediately turns the table by telling him of an old Sith fable about saving the ones you care about from dying.  He also tells him that only Darth Sidious knows of this and that if he finds him, he finds his answer.

At the Temple, Obi-Wan and Padme are discussing Jedi matters when he tricks her into revealing her pregnancy.  Although happy for her and Anakin, he warns her that if the Jedi Council finds out, Anakin would be in danger of being expelled from the Order.  

Anakin begins a manhunt for Darth Sidious, surprisingly tracking him to Palpatine's office.  He is stunned when he finds out that Palpatine is in fact the evil Sith Lord.  Anakin contemplates reporting this to the council, but Palpatine goads him into becoming a Sith Lord, in order to save Padme, while also warning him that the Jedi are planning to murder him and take over the Republic.

At the same time, Obi-Wan and Yoda are sent to Kashyyyk to kill Grievous, while several other Jedi knights are dispatched to search for the Confederacy Chairman Nute Gunray.  Anakin keeps his knowledge a secret from Obi-Wan, who had had nothing but nice things to say about their friendship and Qui-Gon.  Anakin does decide to report to Windu however.  Mace decides to take Anakin with him to arrest Palpatine.

On Kashyyyk, Obi-Wan and Yoda confront Grievous, who uses his four armed lightsaber assault to attack Kenobi.  Yoda tells Obi-Wan that he doesn't need the lightsaber to beat this droid leader.  Obi-Wan and Yoda use their combined force power to obliterate Grievous's windpipe. 

Palpatine and Mace duel in Palpatine's office and Palpatine is ultimately subdued.  At the same time, Dooku breaks out of the Temple and shuts down the defense protocols.  Anakin is stunned when Mace decides to kill Palpatine.  Anakin stops him by blocking Mace's lightsaber with his own.  Mace shoves him back, but Anakin force chokes him to prevent him from murdering his "one chance" to save Padme.  Palpatine shoots Mace with lightning and blasts him out the window.  Anakin, realzing that he can not return to the Jedi now, pledges his loyalty to the Sith, and is knighted Darth Vader.  Palpatine tells Vader to reunite with Dooku in the Jedi Temple and stop the Jedi from taking over the Republic. Palpatine then issues secret command "REVENGE" to the Clone Troopers.  

The clones, as programmed, turn on their Jedi Commanders and slaughter them.  Meanwhile, on Coruscant, Vader and Dooku slaughter Jedi knights with the help of the Clone Troopers.  Sidious then arrives and informs them that only one of them can be his True Apprentice.  Dooku is stunned by this turn of events, but Vader simply decapitates him.

Obi-Wan and Yoda narrowly avoid execution and escape to go to Coruscant.  There, they learn about the destruction of the Order and that Anakin is now Darth Vader.  Yoda decides to confront Palpatine on this matter, while Obi-Wan goes after Vader, but is sidetracked when he learns that Padme is going into labor with the twins.

Vader flies to Mustafar and slaughters the remaining Confederacy leaders, Nute Gunray last.  Yoda arrives in Palpatine's office and the two have duel.  This time, Yoda reveals a lightsaber (here it makes sense, because he needs all of the power he can get to defeat Sidious.  The two duel and Palpatine tricks Yoda into forcing the duel into the Senate chamber, while the senate was still in tact, deacivating his own lightsaber before he is seen.  The Clones open fire on Yoda and he is forced to retreat.  One of the senators, Bail Organa, believes Yoda and takes him to his ship to depart from Coruscant.

Padme has both Luke and Leia, but is then informed that Anakin is now a Sith Lord.  Refusing to believe Obi-Wan, Padme has herself transported to Mustafar to speak with him herself.  Obi-Wan sneaks aboard her ship to face Vader

Palpatine informs the Senate that the "Jedi Rebellion" has been crushed and that with the power given to him, he appoints himself Emperor of the new Galactic Empire.

Padme finds Vader and begs him to tell her what she heard isn't true.  Vader lies to her and says Obi-Wan has been jealous of their relationship for a while.  Padme slowly begins to recognize the Sith Lord's strategy and begins to break down.  She tells him that she will always love who he once was, but not the monster he's become.  Enraged, Anakin Force Chokes her into submission.  Obi-Wan steps out of the cruiser and the two have their intense duel.  In the end, however, Anakin is knocked into the volcano and burnt to death by the lava.

Palpatine travels to Mustafar just as Obi-Wan is leaving with Padme's body.  Palpatine uses the Sith Method of saving people from death and saves Vader from death, but understands that his apprentice will be forced to live in a mechanical suit for the rest of his life.

Obi-Wan, happy that Padme hadn't gotten around to telling Vader that she had given birth, decides along with Yoda and Bail, that the twins need to be hidden.  Bail agrees to take Leia, while Obi-Wan suggests that Luke be brought to Anakin's step-brother Owen and his wife Beru on Tatooine.  Yoda also tells Obi-Wan that if he can learn to communicate with the force completely, he will be able to speak to Qui-Gon from beyond the grave.

Padme is buried on Naboo and Palpatine is intrigued by a plan Commander Tarkin has for a Space Station with enough fire power to destroy a planet, and secretly has his construction crews begin building the Death Star.  Vader, who has been put into the suit, secretly plans to murder Palpatine for lying to him about saving Padme.

Obi-Wan delivers Luke to the Lars Homestead and departs into the desert.  He finds an abandoned hovel and decides to live there.  He begins to meditate and then he hears Qui-Gon say: "You have become a great Jedi, Obi-Wan.  And you will one day save the galaxy once more."

Film Review #3: Pinocchio

If Walt Disney believed that there were quite a few flaws in his first film, he decided to "plus it" and plan out the most technically perfect film he would ever produce.  The question was, what would the film be?  Since Bambi was already struggling to get off the ground, and Fantasia was still only a creative idea, Disney Animators needed a story they could actually create.  Along came Carlo Collodi's Italian fable of a wooden puppet who wanted to become a real boy.  With the best animators in the business, combined with some of the best songwriters, and the world's greatest storyteller, Walt Disney Productions released Pinocchio.  Did the film meet it's lofty expectations, surpass them, or suffer from a "sophomore slump"?
Let's "swallow" our creativity and find out...

Plot: A toymaker named Geppetto sculpted a puppet one night and wished upon a star that the puppet would become real.  Since Geppetto is one of the kindest and most generous people in the village, the Blue Fairy comes to his shop and uses her magic to give the boy life.  Since the boy has no sense of right or wrong, a cricket named Jiminy Cricket is coerced into being his conscience.  Geppetto awakens and is overjoyed to see him.

The next morning, while on his way to his first day of school, two con artists trick him into ditching school and joining a puppet show led by Stromboli.  After being kidnapped by the greedy psychotic Italian, Pinocchio and Jiminy are met once again by the Blue Fairy.  Pinocchio attempts to lie to her, but learns that whenever he lies, his nose grows.  The blue fairy sets him free, but warns him that a bad boy will never be a real boy.

As the puppet and his conscience return home, the child is tricked again into going to Pleasure Island, a haven for runaway boys, including roller coasters, cigarettes, pool tables, and all of the windows to shatter.  Little does the puppet realize that the boys who go to the island are turned into donkeys.  Luckily, Pinocchio and Jiminy escape the island, with only the minimal donkey tail and ears on the puppet.

They finally return home, but learn that Geppetto has gone out to search for him, and was swallowed by a giant whale named Monstro.  Pinocchio decides to go off and rescue his father, against Jiminy's best wishes.  When he reunites with his father inside the whale's belly, the puppet builds a fire to make the whale sneeze them out.  They make it out, but are attacked by the rampaging beast.  Pinocchio sacrifices himself to save his father.  But the Blue Fairy sees his sacrifice and gives him not only life, but also makes him a real boy.

What's Bad?: To be quite honest, I can't find a major flaw in the film's execution.  Not a one.

What's Good?: Let's start at the beginning, with the music.  All of the songs are great and easily recognizable tunes, especially the film's anthem "When You Wish Upon A Star", which has become the company's anthem.  The film's musical score is not only among the best of all of the Disney films, but one of the best all time.

The film is abundant in villainous and wicked characters, such as Honest John and Stromboli, who all add into the archives of Disney Villains.  Stromboli especially is a wicked monster, abusing poor Pinocchio and easily willing to shove the puppet into the limelight as long as he can, until he is in need of firewood.

The film is able to be a strong character film, despite not having a love subplot like it's predecessor had.  We really feel for these characters and their emotions, especially Geppetto.  Jiminy is a fun character, Pinocchio really feels like he's a real boy, and all of the other characters are likeable or recognizable.

The film is far superior to Snow White in terms of animation and special effects.  While Snow White was a bit more cartoony, Pinocchio is a tour de force in terms of animation.  The animation of the ocean water is unbelievable, and was the finest bit of aquatic animation until The Little Mermaid almost fifty years later.  The fine crafting the animators did on even the most diligent details like the music boxes in Geppetto's workshop really show how determined these animators were to surpass their previous efforts.

Overall: Not only is Pinocchio the best film Walt Disney ever made, it is the best Disney film made between 1940 and 1991.  Everything in this film is marvelous.  I highly recommend it, if you haven't already seen it

Report Card
Hero:                       A
Heroine:                  B
Villain(s):                A-
Sidekicks:                A
Animation:              A+
Special Effects:       A+
Songs:                      A
Musical Score:        A+
Story:                      A
Themes:                   A+

Overall: A+ 

Film Review #2: Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

 
 It doesn't take a Magic Mirror to understand this film's legacy on the history of film making.  Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs is a masterful film in terms of animation, quality, and cinematic legacy.  Few people know this, but Walt Disney's very first full length animated feature film convinced MGM to green light The Wizard of Oz to compete with the success of this film.

Walt risked everything to get this film made, and it is still one of the singular most important films in cinematic history.  But can the film hold up to a contemporary audience, one that is used to the sweeping epic animated films like Up, Wall-e, The Lion King, and How to Train Your Dragon?  Let's travel down into the dwarf gold mine and find out...

The Story: Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there lived a lovely little princess named Snow White.  Her vain and wicked stepmother, the Queen, feared that one day Snow White's beauty would surpass her own.  So she dressed the little girl in rags and forced her to work as a servant in her own castle.
Each day, the vain and cruel witch consulted her magic mirror, to see who was the fairest of them all.  As long as the mirror answered that the Queen's beauty surpassed all, Snow White was safe from her cruel jealousy.  But one day, the mirror answered that Snow White is more beautiful and fair than the Queen.  Furious, the Queen called for her Royal huntsman to kill the Queen and bring her back the girl's heart in a box.  But the huntsman could not harm the princess and urged her to run away from the Queen's wrath.

During her flight, the Princess discovers a cottage in the middle of the forest.  Snow White and her animal friends clean the house to convince the people who owned the house that she could be useful and could stay.  The house's owners, seven completely different dwarfs, return that night and discover that the Princess is hiding from the wrath of the Queen.  They agree to shelter her, and all are overjoyed to learn that she would cook and clean for them all the time.  That night, the dwarfs entertain the princess, while the princess tells the dwarfs about her true love, a handsome prince.

Upon learning that Snow White was still alive, the Queen took it upon herself to murder the girl.  She transforms herself into an old hag and created a poisoned apple, that would put her into a deep sleep for eternity. 

The next morning, the Queen approaches Snow White while the dwarfs are away and tricks the Princess into eating the apple.  The Queen is harassed by animals and ultimately chased by the dwarfs, until she falls off a cliff, never to be seen again.

Not being able to find it in their hearts to bury her, the Dwarfs built Snow White a coffin until one day, a prince rides by and kisses the lifeless princess.  She awakens and the dwarfs and woodland critters are overjoyed and Snow White and her prince go off into the sunset together.


What's Bad?: The film's biggest problems unfortunately come from the blandness and uninteresting characters of Snow White and the Prince.  The Prince is especially bland, only being in the film for about five minutes.  He was originally supposed to do more, if you didn't know.  He was supposed to be captured by the Queen's guards and chained in the castle dungeons to prevent him from getting to save Snow White, but the Disney Animators had difficulty designing the human characters, so he is scaled back to his "Bare Necessities" (Sorry, that's a bad pun)

While she is bland as well, I'm going to give Snow White a pass, because this was their first attempt at a female lead, and at least she wasn't Princess Aurora!


What's Good?: Basically...everything else.  The Queen is one of the greatest villains of all time, and I really enjoyed how contrasting she was as both the Queen and the Hag.  The dwarfs are what everybody remembers about the film.  They all had their own personalities, which was really nice to see. 

The music is probably the most famous music in the history of film.  It's songs and score are very catchy and engaging. 

The Animation is top notch.  I loved the effects animation in this film, especially for this being their first film ever.  The best effects scene is when the Queen transforms into the hag.

Overall: The film not only stands out as the first animated film in Hollywood, but it should also stand out as one of the best.  It's characters and songs are memorable, the animation is superior, and the overall tone of the film is perfect.  It is dark when it needs to be dark, and bright and colorful when it needs to be as well.  The film is emotional simplicity at it's finest work, not needing to wrap itself in the logic that the harsh a-hole critics demand from all films.  The film is one that I would definitely recommend.  It's a classic!

Report Card

Hero:                         D-
Heroine:                    B
Villain:                      A
Side Characters:      A
Songs:                        A+
Score:                         A
Tone:                          B+
Animation:                 A
Special Effects:          A
Story:                         A-

Final Grade: A

What Could Have Been? #4: The Super Mario Bros. Movie

Don't we all just love Nintendo?  Who doeit sn't?  Their quite possibly the largest gaming giant in the world and by far the most entertaining.  Every single one of their characters, from Mario and Luigi, to Donkey Kong and Yoshi, and from Link and Fox, to Samus and Pikachu, are as memorable and recognizable to the world as almost all of the characters in Disney's library.

But that doesn't mean they haven't screwed up at all.  For example, when the smash hit game The Super Mario Bros became the highest selling game of all time, Nintendo and other companies (DiC entertainment among others) tried vehemently to capitalize on the game's success by creating toys, Halloween costumes, and that putrid cartoon series.  But by far Nintendo's biggest fuck up in this over-capitalization era was the live action motion picture, The Super Mario Bros. Movie.  Not only was this film awful, disgusting, and a straight up insult to fans, the film flopped miserably at the box office and made Nintendo seal themselves from the warp pipe that leads to Hollywood.  Since then, only the Pokémon franchise has released movies to theaters, mainly on the insistence of 4Kids Entertainment.

Considering the recent drain pipe stoppage of creative ideas in Hollywood (Battleship, Avatar sequels, The Last Airbender, Transformers) it astounds me that Nintendo has refused to make motion pictures based on their cavalcade of characters and situations.  The right story combined with effort, imagination, and heart, can lead to a promising movie.  So, considering what we were given back then, I am going to list several steps that should be done to create a movie based on Nintendo, and also point out what could have made the film a hit.

Step 1: Pick Your Audience
Anybody out there trying to make it big in Hollywood must understand that no matter what you do, your film will not be loved and worshiped by the entire world.  Therefore, you have to pick what kind of audience your film is going to appeal to.  In the case of the piece of shit that was made in the nineties, it made the fatal flaw of trying to appeal to everyone, from the Die Hard fans to the mainstream animated film crowd.  That is why the film failed horribly.  For the sake of my retelling, the film will be an animated film on par with something like Shrek or The Lion King.  Animation has the unique ability to appeal to all audiences, but it is pretty rare that a film can do this and still be a quality film by the standards we've set.

Step 2: Choose The Film's Focus
Why did the 1993 film focus on Luigi and Daisy's romance?  Not only has that only been only implied, it also isn't Luigi's movie.  Luigi is what we writers call a "sidekick".  While it is okay for him to have a character arc (Han Solo and the Genie each had their arcs), they are not the focus of their movies.  Since the film is called Super Mario Bros., then Mario should be the main character.  The film should be about his goals and his desires, not Luigi's. 

Since we are focusing our film on Mario, then Peach is more than likely to be our leading heroine.  And since this is going to be an animated film, Peach can have all of those usual traits that Ariel, Belle, and Jasmine had in their movies, wanting more than what life has thrown at you.  Peach should be character first and a Princess/Damsel second.  A stronger than usual female character will draw in the female demographic.

Step 3: Cast the Characters, NOT THE ACTORS
Films like The Dark Knight, The Lion King, and The Lord of the Rings use their cast of characters to add drama and tension into the plot, instead of what the 1993 film did.  This film just cast whoever it wanted and hoped the film would be a hit on name basis alone.  If Dungeons and Dragons proved anything, it's that Marlon Wayans and Jeremy Irons do not belong in the same movie, despite both putting up pitiful roles.  Bob Hoskins, John Leguizamo and Dennis Hopper are poorly cast for a fantasy film about a strange Wonderland like place. 


In casting Mario and Luigi, you want to find actors who can act in sync with each other.  You'd want actors who can get a genuine emotion out of the characters, while not taking away their personalities.  Mario is brave and outgoing, and is willing to risk everything for his friends.  Luigi, conversely, is more of a book smart and cowardly type of character, but is a bit more sarcastic than Mario is.  In this case, I would cast someone like Zac Efron as Mario, and make Luigi someone like Jesse McCartney.

In the case of Bowser, you want someone who is menacing and cruel, but also someone who can feign sympathy towards someone.  When Vincent Price was cast as Professor Ratigan in The Great Mouse Detective, he provided a large and powerful antagonist with a suave and dignified personality that always wavered between in control and way out of control.  That role is what you want for Bowser.  In the old days, someone like Gene Hackman, Christopher Lee, or James Earl Jones would have been given this role.  In this film, he will be portrayed by someone like Michael Shannon or Chris Hemsworth.

Peach and Daisy would be contrasting characters.  Peach is more regal and gentle than Daisy, while Daisy is more of a tomboy and adventure seeking princess.  Peach will be played by Hayden Panitierre, Megan Fox or Amy Adams.  Daisy would be portrayed by the likes of Mila Kunis, Kaley Cuoco, Anne Hathaway, or Natalie Portman.

While they will be working for Bowser, Wario and Waluigi will provide comic relief to the story, often breaking the fourth wall with their jokes.  Like with the Mario bros, you have to incorporate two actors who have chemistry in their scenes, much like Ernie Sabella and Nathan Lane had in The Lion King.  Since they will be more like bandits and thieves than the other two, they will have to have grittier and more rougher personalities.  I could see people like Seth MacFarlane and Gilbert Gottfried as these two, because of their witty banter with each other.

Step 4: Building the World
The world that was shown for us in the 1993 film was weird, bizarre, and yet disgusting and downbeat.  If you wish to stay loyal to the game of origin, than you have to create the bright and colorful world of the Mushroom Kingdom.  You can incorporate the vast and open scenery of the video games (desert, jungle, volcanoes, cities, and open fields) into the film while not making it look like it was shoehorned in just to please fans.  Have Peach's castle surrounded by a massive old european-style city, where everyday life takes shape.  Beyond the palace gates, the castle should be littered with beautiful flowers, rose bushes, and romantic fountains.  Beyond the city gates, can lie a vast and uncharted land, where you never know where you'll be swept off to.

Bowser's castle can be surrounded by hot boiling lava, while the inside can be refined and proper, much like how the beast wishes to present himself. 

Step 5: Motivations!!
Why does Bowser kidnap Peach?  Is it to gain a ransom?  Does he love her and want to marry her?  Or is she just a pawn in a much bigger game of chess than previously imagined?  We can have Bowser be in a position similar to that of Jafar in Aladdin or Long Feng in Avatar: The Last Airbender, where he secretly runs the kingdom while plotting to overthrow the King and seize unlimited power.  Peach's kidnapping devastates the King, who secludes himself in his study while sending countless servants out to find her.  With the King now vulnerable, Bowser will complete his takeover of the land, while also keeping a very valuable hostage.

Perhaps Bowser is motivated by vengeance.  Perhaps a hundred years ago, there was a great war between Koopas and the Toads.  The Koopas were defeated and cast out into the land where Bowser has his castle hidden.  Maybe he is able to convince the King that their mistreatment for decades should be undone, all while promising his Koopa brethren that they will take what is rightfully theirs.

Step 6: Relationships
Mario and Luigi should share a genuine brotherly relationship.  While they do love each other, they can act like real brothers and butt heads a lot.  For instance, you can have Luigi jealous that Mario is the more popular of the two of them, but make it more of a subplot.  Or, since Mario is virtually guaranteed the Princess at the end, you could have Luigi a bit more of a klutz when it comes to women, especially Daisy.

Mario and Peach should also have a strong relationship.  They would love each other for who they are in contrast to their physical appearances. 

Step 7: Conflict
No story exists without conflict.  Nothing is resolved or learned if there is no conflict.  The main conflict would be between the Mario brothers and Bowser.  The King Koopa may look at these two with a sense of mockery and lack of interest.  But as they get further and further along, he could view them as a potentially dangerous threat and send his most evil accomplices after them (Petey Phiranna, Wiggler, Boos)

A sub-conflict could be between Peach and Bowser, where the Princess tries every way possible to stop Bowser from taking over the kingdom.  Bowser could have a sort of psychotic attraction to her that keeps him from murdering her, while Peach is thoroughly disgusted by him.


Step 8: Don't Feel Inclined to Copy Disney!
Almost every Disney film has something to market and sell to the people.  If you are making a story that is dark and interesting, there's no need to over-market the cute characters like Yoshi and Toad.  That just makes you look like a sellout instead of a visionary.

Step 9: Climax!
The Key to a successful film is a gripping climax, one that could have your audience on the edge of their seats.  The 1993 P.O.S. lacked a truly interesting conflict, mainly because you are so bored that you wish the dinosaurs they were talking about would turn into the ones from Jurassic Park and eat your head off.

Mario and Luigi have saved the Princess, and now they are returning to the Mushroom Kingdom to deal with the evil Bowser once and for all.  They show up to the kingdom and see it in ruins.  Bowser and Mario square off in the throne room and Bowser is so enraged he causes the ground to begin spewing lava.  In his hatred, he lunges at Mario but falls into the lava pit and dies. 


That's about it...I feel like I covered just about everything.  A Mario movie is doable, but it requires actual effort and care put in.  A well-crafted Mario film is a guaranteed blockbuster. 

Feel free to leave a comment below telling me how you'd repair that awful 1993 film, or if you'd like me to take a swing at anything else, like Zelda or Pokémon.