What Could Have Been? #3: Attack of the Clones

If any of you out there know me, than you know that I have a fascination with the Star Wars universe, the prequel films included.  I am fascinated that Lucas was able to combine the philosophy and mythological teachings of Joseph Campbell, with allusions to world religions and historical falls of republics and the eventual rise of tyrannical dictators like Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler, and bring about the most fascinating story ever assembled by just one simple man with a dream.

With that said, the prequel trilogy is one of the worst trilogies of films of all time in terms of acting, writing, and generally less than spectacular special effects, proving that Lucas is more interested in telling a story that is visually compelling instead of relying on the kind of writing that brought out such classics as "A New Hope" and "The Empire Strikes Back".  In these posts, I will be focusing on what could have made Episodes I-III not only as good as the original trilogy, but even more superior when compared to such famous trilogies as "The Lord of the Rings" and "The Dark Knight".

Episode II: Attack of the Clones

The Film begins with it's traditional opening crawl:

The Republic is on the brink of destruction.  The Confederacy of Independent Systems

has had a string of victories since their defeat at Naboo five years ago, and with Master Yoda

refusing to allow the Jedi to be involved in the war, it seems

that Coruscant may yet be in reach.

As the Republic's casualties mount, the systems in the senate are

all debating whether or not the Republic is worth losing millions of lives

each day.  As each system withdraws from the Republic, the Republic's volunteer army

continues to deteriorate.

On Coruscant, a major bill is currently under debate, which would place the Jedi Council

under the jurisdiction of Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, a bill that doesn't sit well

with the Jedi....

On Coruscant, in the Jedi Temple, Mace Windu, Yoda, and informant Padme Amidala discuss the bill.  Mace begins to question Palpatine's intentions, including his rumored involvement in the assassination of Chancellor Valorum.  Padme defends Palpatine, but does understand where the Jedi are coming from.  She also informs the Jedi that she will be taking some time off, due to her oncoming wedding to the nephew of Duchess Satine of Mandalore.

Meanwhile on the planet of Raxus Prime, Obi-Wan and Anakin (26 and 19) are in hot pursuit of Darth Maul, who has been attacking many Republic shipments in the Outer Rim.  Maul eludes his Jedi enemies, and is ordered by Count Dooku to move to their base on Mandalore.  Anakin and Obi-Wan square off against a group of battle droids and escape in hot pursuit of Maul.  The two are contacted by Chancellor Palpatine, who requests that the two return to Coruscant. 

Anakin and Padme reunite in the Senate building, and the maiden informs her old friend about her engagement to the young Duke of Mandalore.  Obviously, the young Jedi is visibly jealous.  The three meet with Palpatine, whom informs them that the bill had been passed.  He requests that both Jedi escort Padme to Mandalore, telling Obi-Wan to negotiate with Duchess Satine, whom he knows Obi-Wan has been in love with all his life (he intends to test both Jedi with the temptation of both revenge on Maul and being around the girls that they love).  Anakin confesses his love to Padme, who decides to shoot him down, citing that the Jedi Code forbids them from ever being together, and that her marriage to Duke Armon will save the Republic.

As their ship enters hyperspace, Anakin is viewing the HoloNet, and learns that Bespin and Kashyyyk have both fallen to the Confederacy.  Just as he is about to turn it off in frustration, he is contacted by a mysterious billionaire named Jango Fett, who offers him a chance to save the Republic during the war.  The temptation of being a hero makes Anakin immediately agree, but when Obi-Wan asks him about the phone call, Anakin brushes off the notion.

Duchess Satine meets the group on a landing platform, and immediately whisks Padme away to be with Duke Armon.  Obi-Wan goes off with them, while Anakin secretly departs for Fett's mansion.  Anakin meets with Fett and learns that the billionaire scientist has perfected cloning and has created his own private army.  He also explains that he was approached by Qui-Gon Jinn a few weeks prior to the Battle of Naboo and that Jinn had ordered an army to be created for the Republic.  Anakin is in awe of the army, but his thoughts still linger on the fact that Qui-Gon hadn't told anyone about the army.

That evening, Anakin returns to Satine's palace only to find Padme and Armon kissing, which drives the Jedi into a rage.  Obi-Wan comes to calm him down and the two exchange banter regarding both of their personal relationships.  The two begin to realize their growing friendship, and Anakin tells Obi-Wan about his meeting with Jango.  Obi-Wan immediately reports this to the Council, but he only reaches Palpatine, whom informs the Jedi that not only is Darth Maul on Mandalore, but that Qui-Gon had ordered the creation on behalf of the late Chancellor Valorum.

During the engagement party, Anakin is thrown into more jealousy.  This time, he contacts Palpatine about his emotions, and Palpatine tells him of a secret plot that the Republic has discovered: Armon intends to murder his Aunt and bring Mandalore into the war on Dooku's side.  Anakin tries to tell Satine about this, but is distracted by a young boy who is wearing a Mandalorian Bounty Hunter's suit.  Anakin goes on the attack, but learns that the boy is Boba Fett, Jango's son.  Before Anakin can arrest Fett for trespassing, the young Jedi senses Count Dooku and goes to find him.

During a speech she makes, Padme accidentally says she loves Anakin instead of Armon, which dives the Duke into a rage.  He is about to chastise her, when Darth Maul enters with his Magnaguards and force chokes the Duke to death, claiming Mandalore for his own.  Obi-Wan, despite being tempted to go after the Sith, decides to protect Satine and takes her deep into the castle.  Despite bravely fending off droids and protecting the guests, Padme is captured and the droids begin their coup of Mandalore.

Anakin and Boba find Dooku in the study.  Anakin faces off against Dooku in a lightsaber duel, which Dooku wins by electrocuting Anakin with force lightning, rendering him unconscious.  Dooku is about to murder Boba when Jango arrives.  Through a discussion, it is revealed that despite his offering of the Clone Army to the Republic, Fett secretly supports the Confederacy.  Anakin is left to Boba, who decides to revive the Jedi and take him back to his loft.

Obi-Wan and Satine rekindle their relationship, as Obi-Wan reveals that he was willing to leave the Jedi Order for her when they first fell in love, but Qui-Gon had made him leave.  The two talk more about how the Republic is crumbling, until Maul finds them.  He and Obi-Wan duel, which ends with Obi-Wan nearly having his chest sliced open.  Maul takes Satine away with him, believing Kenobi to be dead.

Boba and his father are shooting targets.  Boba asks his father if Mandalore will enter the war, to which Jango tells his son that they will be joining the Confederacy, as soon as Duchess Satine agrees to Darth Mauls treaty.  Jango then tells his son that they would be leaving Mandalore forever and go to Naboo to have Boba study politics, something the boy despises.

Obi-Wan wakes up and contacts Yoda to tell him about Mandalore being overrun.  Yoda tells him to use the Clones, but Kenobi informs him that the Senate must approve it, since Qui-Gon ordered the army for the Republic and not the Jedi.  And with the Senate in endless debate mode, the army would never be passed.

Yoda and Mace go to Palpatine and tell him about this.  One of the officers, Sergeant Tarkin, suggests that if the Senate were to vote the Chancellor emergency powers, he could approve the army's creation.

Anakin awakens in Boba's room.  Boba tell Anakin that he was supposed to kill him, but decides to help him save Mandalore, having stolen his father's codes for the Clone Army.  The two go off to save Padme and Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan enters the throne room and prepares to duel Maul again, who taunts him with insults about Qui-Gon and how Obi-Wan should have picked Dooku over Jinn.  Obi-Wan is about to attack Maul, when he brings out Satine in chains.  He demands that Obi-Wan surrender and choose whether or not Satine or Padme would die. 

Anakin and Boba enter the dungeons and rescue Padme.  Padme finally confesses to Anakin her love and the two kiss.  Unfortunately, the three are captured by Jango, who has them all, including Boba, sentenced to death.

On Coruscant, the Senate marginally approves the Emergency Powers Act, and Palpatine uses it to announce the creation of the Clone Army and the Jedi's now personal involvement in the crisis.  Mace decides to go and bring an army of Jedi to help out on Mandalore.  Yoda decides to go too, sensing the Dark Side growing stronger.

Obi-Wan decides to endure, and Maul brutishly stabs Satine in the chest.  Obi-Wan lunges at Maul in a rage and the two re-engage in their duel.  The duel gets very intense and when Obi-Wan is about to slay Maul in hatred, Yoda arrives.  Yoda shows Obi-Wan the light and the Jedi decides to spare Maul.  Maul lunges to strike back, but Yoda blasts him into a wall.  As he returns to the fray, he and Obi-Wan duel onto a catwalk until Maul is tripped up and is blasted by Obi-Wan into a vat of acid.

The three prisoners are about to be executed, when Mace, Obi-Wan, and the Jedi Army arrive.  After a long battle, Jango is killed and the Jedi are surrounded.  The Clones arrive, being led by Yoda.  The Battle of Mandalore begins.

Anakin goes after Dooku alone.  The two duel again.  Though the fight is much more even, Dooku severs his arm off.  Yoda arrives to protect Anakin and ultimately decides to duel his former apprentice.  But instead of using his lightsaber (which is retarded), he and Dooku have a Force duel, which includes hurling rocks and lightning at each other.  Clearly outmatched by his former master, Dooku is forced to to retreat.  He vows that the Jedi and the Republic will eventually bow before him.

In a turn of events, Dooku goes to Maul's scorched body.  Maul is crippled and scarred beyond legitimate repair, but Dooku explains that he is ordered by Sidious to revive Maul until the "Final Operation" is at hand, causing Dooku to look up towards the sky as Republic warships circle overhead.

Kenobi and Padme talk outside Anakin's hospital room, and Kenobi tells her to end her relationship with Anakin, before it gets too dangerous.  Padme refuses, not willing to lose Anakin again.  As Obi-Wan leaves, Boba arrives to give Kenobi the keys to the Cloning Facilities, telling him he is going off to become the world's most feared Bounty Hunter.  Padme bids Fett farewell, and goes into the hospital room to be with Anakin. 







Film Review #1: Man of Steel

This is my first ever film review, so I apologize beforehand if I sound a bit amateurish while writing this post.

Well, it's finally here.  My very first film review.  I decided to choose Man of Steel as my first review, for a couple of reasons.  The first, is that I've never truly been a big fan of Superman.  I always felt that he wasn't as cool as Batman, and that the original films were kind of goofy in terms of special effects and acting (I like them though).  Second, is that this is the film I've seen most recently, as I just saw it on Friday.  Thirdly, because I want to express my opinion on what has surprisingly become a highly controversial movie.  This film, like The Dark Knight Rises before it, has started a major war between fans and critics about how to tell the story of this famous American superhero. 

Plot: (Borrowed from Wikipedia)
The planet Krypton faces imminent destruction due to its unstable core, the result of years of depleting Krypton's natural resources. The ruling council is deposed by the planet's military commander General Zod and his followers during a military coup. Scientist Jor-El and his wife Lara launch their newborn son Kal-El on a spacecraft to Earth after infusing his cells with a genetic codex of the entire Kryptonian race. After Zod murders Jor-El, he and his followers are captured and banished to the Phantom Zone. However, Krypton explodes some time afterwards, freeing them.
Kal-El's ship lands in a small Kansas town. He is raised as the adoptive son of Jonathan and Martha Kent, who name him Clark. Clark's Kryptonian physiology affords him superhuman abilities on Earth, which initially cause him confusion and ostracism, but he gradually learns to harness his powers to help others. Jonathan reveals to a teenage Clark that he is an alien and advises him not to use his powers publicly, fearing that society will reject him. After Jonathan's death, an adult Clark spends several years living a nomadic lifestyle, working different jobs under false identities, while saving people in secret as well as struggling to cope with the loss of his adoptive father. He eventually infiltrates a U.S. military investigation of a Kryptonian scout spaceship in the Arctic. Clark enters the alien ship, and it allows him to communicate with the preserved consciousness of Jor-El in the form of a hologram. Jor-El reveals Clark's origins and the extinction of his race, and tells Clark that he was sent to Earth to bring hope to mankind. Lois Lane, a journalist from the Daily Planet who was sent to write a story on the discovery, sneaks inside the ship while following Clark and is rescued by him when she is injured. Lois's editor, Perry White, rejects her story of a "superhuman" rescuer, so she traces Clark back to Kansas with the intention of writing an exposé. After hearing his story, she decides not to reveal his secret.
Meanwhile, Zod and his crew seek out other worlds that the Kryptonian race colonized. However, the colonies did not survive long after Krypton's destruction. They eventually pick up a Kryptonian distress signal sent from the ship Clark discovered on Earth. Zod arrives and demands the humans surrender Kal-El, whom he believes has the codex, or else Earth will be destroyed. Clark agrees, and the military hand him and Lois over to Zod's second-in-command, Faora, at Zod's request. Zod reveals that he intends to use a terraforming "world engine" to transform Earth into a new Krypton and use the codex to repopulate the planet with genetically-engineered Kryptonians. This transformation will result in the destruction of mankind. After Clark and Lois escape Zod's ship with Jor-El's help, Clark defeats Faora and Nam-Ek, convincing the military that he is an ally. Zod deploys the world engine and initiates the process in Metropolis and over the Indian Ocean.
Clark, now being called "Superman", destroys the world engine, while the military uses the spacecraft that brought him to Earth in an aerial strike on Zod's ship over Metropolis, sending Zod's forces back into the Phantom Zone. Superman destroys the ship which carries the Genesis Chamber, the pivotal technology to restore the Kryptonian race with the codex. Only Zod remains, who engages Superman in a destructive battle across Metropolis. When Zod attempts to murder cornered civilians in revenge for his defeat, Superman is forced to kill him. Some time later, Superman continues to try to earn the U.S. government's trust, though evading their efforts to uncover his secret identity. To create an alias that gives him access to dangerous situations without arousing suspicion, Clark takes a job as a reporter at the Daily Planet.

What's Good?: The one character I felt that I sympathized with the most in this movie is General Zod.  While I don't find Michael Shannon's portrayal of Zod as intimidating as Terrence Stamp's portrayal, or as menacing as Liam Neeson's portrayal as Ra's Al Ghul, I felt a great deal of sympathy for what Zod was trying to accomplish.  He was trying to do good, but for all the wrong reasons, much like Ra's in Batman Begins.  Seeing the look in Zod's eyes as he held what was left in his hand was pretty depressing.  He is only a villain by what role society has him playing.  His was by far the best performance in the film.

I was also happy that they now gave Superman a reason for him not to kill.  With Bruce Wayne, I only noticed the only reason he didn't kill was because of how disgusted Rachel was when he told her he was going to kill Joe Chill.  I agree fully with Clark snapping Zod's neck in order to save what was left of Metropolis, seeing it as the only way for the fighting to end.  After all, the two of them could fight forever until Earth is nothing but ashes.  In fact, they probably would.

I feel that the story was adequately explained to me, being a newcomer to the story arc.  Of course, there are some things that don't make sense, but I feel that the whole story of Krypton's destruction, Zod's backstory, and how Clark had to cope with being a freak among humans was told in an understandable and comprehensible manner (for me at least) .

Also, the inner Revenge of the Sith fan in me feels that I have to say the special effects are freaking impressive.  Superman flying, the implosion of Krypton, and the complete fight between Zod and Superman was amazing.  If you could combine that with the story of The Dark Knight, what a film this would be

What's Bad?: It's pretty clear that Zack Snyder and Christopher Nolan took some pages from the George Lucas book of writing screenplays.  The film is not the best written, and many things aren't explained well.  But almost every performance, from Costner to Crowe, and Adams to Cavill, the acting in this movie is both bland and forgettable.  No one but Shannon stands out in any way, as the film drags on with the poor performances all around.

The editing is almost like looking at a poorly put together photo album, as the flashbacks to Clark's childhood are back and forth a lot in this film.  The chemistry between Clark and Lois is virtually non-existent, as the two never share one touching moment on screen and we're just supposed to believe that they're together because they end up together. 

And while those are my two problems with the film, they are unfortunately big problems.  And normally, two problems like this would sink the whole film for me.  But here, I wasn't as offended by these problems as others were, because I was never a big fan of Superman to begin with. 

Overall, I do like the film.  I guess you could call it a guilty pleasure.  I love Zod, I love the action and I love the story for, the most part. 

Report Card:

Story: B
Acting: C-
Action: A
Themes: B
Musical Score: B+
Chemistry: D

Final Grade: B-

Recommendations?: If you're a huge fan of the comics or the original movies, I won't guarantee that you'll like the film much.  But if you're interested, go see it.  It should have a little something for everybody.

Is this film in my Top 50 Favorite Films?: Perhaps...

Leave a comment below telling me your opinions on the matter.  I'm open to discussion.

What Could Have Been? #2: Disney Film Re-releases

The very first movie I ever watched in the movie theaters happened to be The Little Mermaid, back in 1997.  Being the young 90's kid that I was, I adored this movie.  I loved the story, I loved the music, I was in love with Ariel, the whole film was a masterpiece and still is.  In fact, you can guarantee a film review of this to come up soon. 

When we left the theater, my Dad decided that we were going to stop at a garage sale.  When we got there, my sister and I hurried towards the videotape bin to see if there was a movie we didn't own (back then, we only owned Dumbo, Aladdin, Beauty and the Beast, The Lion King, Robin Hood, Pocahontas, and Toy Story).  Sure enough, we found the ultimate collection of VHS tapes, $2 each!  (The Jungle Book, Cinderella, Return of Jafar, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Pinocchio, Bambi, Sleeping Beauty, Fox and the Hound, 101 Dalmatians, The Great Mouse Detective, The Little Mermaid, and The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh)

When we got home and began shoving each tape into the VCR, and I found out that The Little Mermaid was actually originally released back in 1989 (I thought all Disney videos came out when I was born XD)  But why weren't all Disney films available ALL THE TIME?  Why did Disney re-release Mermaid?  Why does Disney wait 7-10 years to re-release their movies?  And why did they stop re-releasing them in theaters?  In this post, I'll be discussing why Disney does what they do, when to expect your favorite film to be back on video, and why releasing Pixar movies was a shameful thing to attempt by Disney.

The Nightmare Begins...lol

The world was engulfed in turmoil.  Hitler, Mussolini and Hirohito were carving up both the Allies and the rest of the world.  Britain was on the brink of collapse, while France, Denmark, and the USSR were being overrun by the Nazis.  This worldwide affair would spell doom for the once economically sound Walt Disney Productions, whose first film had grossed more than any film outside of Gone With The Wind.  As the war began to heat up, Walt had to watch Pinocchio and Fantasia lose a substantial amount of money.  By the end of 1940, they were worse off than they were when they tried to make Snow White back in 1937, despite both film doing very well in the US.

Although Dumbo was able to generate much needed income, the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor brought the United States into the war.  The very next morning, the US Army moved onto the Disney lot and several artists left to fight in the war.  With virtually no market for the film, it as no surprise that Bambi bombed just like the other films did.  Disney was now in the business of creating training films and morale boosting propaganda.  Since they weren't being paid for it, the Disney bank accounts were virtually empty.  The Studio needed a big hit, but did not have the money to create one.  They needed another Snow White.

Snow White?  Snow White!  That's It!

The film didn't cost a cent to re-release, the film was a virtually guaranteed hit, and there was a whole generation that never had a chance to see the film.  The film was re-released in 1944, and was a smash success.  The studio was saved, and the war was coming to an end.  As the war died down, Disney re-released the other films, which all finally began to generate huge amounts of profit.  As the studio recovered, they were also able to release new classics like Cinderella, Alice in Wonderland, and Lady and the Tramp.  The success of Snow White launched Disney's tradition of re-releasing their movies every 7 to 10 years.

1950's: WTF????

As television became a huge industry in America, few moviemakers in Hollywood were willing to take advantage of the new medium.  Being the evil genius that he was, Disney took advantage of TV not only to generate more income, but to gain finances needed to create his dream: Disneyland.  So naturally, if Walt was going to keep the audiences coming back, he needed a good idea for an episode.  His result?  Dumbo!  Yeah, that's right.  Dumbo, though severely edited, was the second episode of the Disneyland TV series.  It was soon followed by a severely edited version of Alice in Wonderland.  This showed that Walt was willing to make sacrifices to make his TV show interesting.  The board, however, was less inclined to change their re-release program.  While the two I mentioned above would be shown again and again on TV, 15 animated films as of 1983 would never be released on video or on television: Snow White, Pinocchio, Fantasia, Bambi, Cinderella, Peter Pan, Lady and the Tramp, Sleeping Beauty, One Hundred and One Dalmatians, The Sword in the Stone, The Jungle Book, The Aristocats, Robin Hood, The Rescuers, and The Fox and the Hound.

When Home Video came into being, these films were barred from ever hitting store shelves, although Mary Poppins, Dumbo, Alice in Wonderland, Fun and Fancy Free, and The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh were all released at the earliest of times.

1984: The Beginning of the End...

After a re-release in 1982, Robin Hood did poorly, grossing only $9 million.  So, naturally, when the Old Guard of the board clashed with Michael Eisner and his new regime, the first film the two groups could agree on was Robin Hood.  In Fall of 1984, Robin Hood became the first of the "Untouchables" to be released on video.  The film began the "Walt Disney Classics" collection of videos. 

1985: The End of The Beginning of the End...

Proving that he was going to answer to no one, Michael Eisner proclaimed that after a very successful re-release in 1984, Pinocchio would be the next film to be released on Home Video.  This would prove to be the Darth Maul stab in the chest of re-releases (see more in 1992).  Although the film was very successful on video, it also has the distinction of being the first (and last until 1988), of having a teaser trailer for an upcoming movie, in this case, The Black Cauldron.  But since The Black Cauldron tanked miserably, Disney began to question full-length animation's ability to survive the invasion of Hollywood. 

1986: Sleeping Beauty and The Sword in the Stone are released on video for the first time.  Neither has received a substantial re-release to theaters since (see 1992)

1987: Lady and the Tramp is released on video.  It has not received a substantial re-release to theaters since.

1988: Cinderella is released on video.  It has not had a significant re-release since.  This VHS marks not only a return to advertising the next Disney Classic (Oliver and Company), but also introduced a new logo

1989: Bambi is released on video for the first time.  It has not received a re-release to theaters since.

The Black Cauldron was initially supposed to be the next film in the "Classics" line.  It even received a tape master for it. But a certain red headed mermaid stopped the film from being released on home video until 1998, ironically the same year The Little Mermaid was released on video the second time.

1990: The Movie that Started the Fall...oh and Peter Pan


Just a few months after the film stopped showing in theaters, Disney announced that in May 1990, they would be releasing The Little Mermaid to home video, making it the first post-Untouchable film ever to be released on video.  This was a highly controversial announcement, specifically due to the fact that the film had just been out in theaters and had yet to be re-released.  Could Disney still do that?  Well, they did.  Mermaid went on to become the top selling video of the year, while Disney still claimed a re-release would still be in the future for the young Ariel.

Peter Pan was also released to video for the first time. It has yet to receive a theatrical re-release since 1989.  This VHS had the distinction of being the first to promote another video, obviously being The Little Mermaid.

1991: The Jungle Book, Robin Hood, The Rescuers Down Under, and Fantasia are released to video for the first time.  None of these films has been re-released since, or in Down Under's case, ever.

1992: The Dead End Signs begin...

101 Dalmatians, The Great Mouse Detective, The Rescuers, and Beauty and the Beast are all released on video for the first time.  All but Beauty and the Beast are never released to theaters again.

The first post-home video title was being re-released to theaters: Pinocchio.  But a disappointing turn at the box office sealed this film's fate.  Sleeping Beauty was scheduled to be re-released in Spring 1993, but Pinocchio's poor results quickly canceled that.

1993: The Last LEGITIMATE Horse nears the finish line

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs is re-released to theaters for the very last time. 

Aladdin is released to home video for the first time.  It has yet to receive a re-release to theaters of any kind (why?)

1994: The Last LEGITIMATE Horse crosses the finish line

The Fox and the Hound is released on video for the first time.  It has yet to receive a theatrical re-release since.  This film also marks the final film in the Walt Disney Classics collection.

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs is released on video for the first time.  It has yet to receive another re-release.

Due to the delayed production on A Goofy Movie, Disney re-releases The Lion King to theaters after being off the big screen for a few weeks.

1996: The First Experiment...

Having been the only successful film to not have been released to video yet, Disney announced a re-release of Oliver and Company, which came out in the spring of 1996.  The film was then released to video that fall.  It has yet to receive a legitimate re-release to theaters since.

The Aristocats is the last Untouchable to be released on video.  Like the others, it has yet to receive a re-release to theaters since.

1997: Mermaid rides again...

The Little Mermaid is re-released to theaters after its first run in 1989.  The film did quite well for a re-release, grossing over $27 million dollars in just 17 days.  On that pace, it would have out-grossed both Don Bluth's Anastasia and Disney's own film, Hercules, by a country mile. 

Disney planned to re-release Beauty and the Beast next, but the film would be delayed for quite some time due to animation constraints.

2001: Belle Sings, but the movie sinks...

Beauty and the Beast is final re-released in late 2001.  The film included a new musical number, but failed to bring in the money expected, chiefly due to Eisner's short sighted decision to release it only into IMAX theaters and Large Format Cinemas.

2002: It's a Merry Christmas to All...except for the Pridelands

The Lion King is re-released Christmas Day 2002.  I saw it, but no one else really did.  The film did even worse than Beast did, ultimately cancelling a scheduled re-release of Aladdin, ironically the only film that IMAX would work really well for.

2009: The Toys are Back...in 3D?

In order to properly promote Toy Story 3, both Toy Story and it's sequel are re-released for a very limited time to theaters, with the added gimmick of 3D vision.  The film did modestly well, and Disney was willing to take another huge gamble on their next 3D re-release.

Monsters Inc. and Finding Nemo go into the Disney Vault (KEEP THIS IN MIND)

2010: Beauty and the Beast is re-released on DVD and Blu-Ray (KEEP THIS IN MIND)

2011: Hakuna Matata means BIG MONEY!!!

In a huge gamble, Disney decides to re-release The Lion King to theaters in 3D.  The film exceeded everyones expectations, dominating the box office for over four weeks while also prime pumping the film higher on the All Time Grossers list. 

2012: If it aint broke, They'll break it... ):(

After the immense success of The Lion King, Disney announced that the film would be followed by several other films.  And all but one of them were terrible and stupid ideas. 

Beauty and the Beast is re-released in 3D a few weeks after Christmas.  The film did poorly (I'll explain more below)

Finding Nemo is re-released in 3D.  It did poorly.

2013: My Last Straw...

After Monsters Inc. failed at the box office, Disney withdrew their plans to re-release The Little Mermaid in 3D (The only one of these four we wanted to see)

Why Did these recent re-releases fail?

1. Not only was Beauty and the Beast showing on ABC Family that Christmas season, but the film was also STILL AVAILABLE TO BUY AT THE STORES!!!!

2. Everyone and their mother has seen either Finding Nemo or Monsters Inc.  The reason The Lion King worked so well, was because it was out of the public's grasp for almost 6 years.  Since both of the aforementioned films are ALWAYS showing on either ABC Family and Disney Channel, it defeats the purpose of shelling out $30 dollars just for the tickets.

Here is a list that I have comprised of the 10 films (both Disney and Pixar) that should have received a 3D re-release, or a re-release in general (no specific order):

1. Aladdin
2. The Lion King
3. The Incredibles
4. The Little Mermaid
5. Sleeping Beauty
6. Fantasia
7. Tarzan
8. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
9. Atlantis: The Lost Empire
10. The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Has the tradition continued?

Yes, it has, but at the cost of seeing these movies the way they were meant to be seen.  I remember my Grandma telling me how she used to go to the theaters to go see these movies.  I can relate to her too, having seen Mermaid and King in theaters.  The tradition has continued, but down a slope I hope Disney can climb back from.

Re-releases on Video coming up

Fall 2013: The Little Mermaid
Spring 2014: The Jungle Book
Fall 2014: Sleeping Beauty
Spring 2015: Aladdin? (PLEASE!!!!)

My Plan...

My plan is simple: if Disney waits every 7 years (as opposed to Peter Pan's 3 and Aladdin's 13,000) then re-releases these movies in theaters, they will still generate interest and profit.  For example, let's say in 2017, Disney wants to re-release both Tangled and Beauty and the Beast.  They release them to theaters first, then to video a few months later.  The films will still gross money and don't have much of a cost to re-release.  If Disney markets it correctly, they would hit Lion King numbers ALL THE TIME!

Bottom Line: Disney, focus more on YOUR animated films.  You still have millions of fans who love them more than Pixar or any of that crap on the Disney Channel or Disney XD.  But more on that in a later post.

What Could Have Been? #1: The Phantom Menace

If any of you out there know me, than you know that I have a fascination with the Star Wars universe, the prequel films included.  I am fascinated that Lucas was able to combine the philosophy and mythological teachings of Joseph Campbell, with allusions to world religions and historical falls of republics and the eventual rise of tyrannical dictators like Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler, and bring about the most fascinating story ever assembled by just one simple man with a dream.

With that said, the prequel trilogy is one of the worst trilogies of films of all time in terms of acting, writing, and generally less than spectacular special effects, proving that Lucas is more interested in telling a story that is visually compelling instead of relying on the kind of writing that brought out such classics as "A New Hope" and "The Empire Strikes Back".  In these posts, I will be focusing on what could have made Episodes I-III not only as good as the original trilogy, but even more superior when compared to such famous trilogies as "The Lord of the Rings" and "The Dark Knight".

*I also recommend watching belatedmedia's video "What if Episode I was good".  It's a truly fascinating video, giving insight to how "The Phantom Menace" cold have been a much more interesting film

Episode I: The Phantom Menace

The film begins on the planet Coruscant, instead of Naboo.  Supreme Chancellor Valorum is meeting with his Jedi Order informant, Palpatine.  They are discussing a recent skirmish the Jedi were involved in on the planet Mandalore, where several Jedi were killed by a rebel group of Mandalorian bounty hunters, which has truly damaged the leader of the mission, Jedi Master Dooku.  Palpatine informs the Chancellor that Dooku has already resigned from the Order and that the Order is worried about the growing tension of the outlying systems of the Republic.  The meeting is interrupted by Valorum's youngest intern, Padme Amidala, who tells the Chancellor about a coup on Cato Nemoidia, that has brought billionaire Viceroy Nute Gunray to power.  Gunray has been outspoken against the Republic for years and intends to take his system out of the Republic and form his own galactic regime.

Meanwhile, Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn and his TWO apprentices, Obi-Wan Kenobi (23) and Anakin Skywalker (14), arrive on Dooku's home planet of Serreno to try to convince the aged Jedi to return to the Order.  Qui-Gon teaches his two apprentices about patience and learning to be mindful of the Force.  During their meeting, Dooku extends an open invitation for his former apprentice to join his Confederacy of Independent Systems, claiming that the Republic that they had sworn to serve had become too corrupt to defend and had to be destroyed.  Qui-Gon, though tempted by the offer, declines, sighting his faith in Chancellor Valorum.  Dooku, enraged by his apprentice's rejection of the offer, orders their capture, sending a wave of battle droids at them.  But the three Jedi escape and return to Coruscant, shaken by the Jedi Master's corruption.

As they travel through hyperspace, the news station reports that an assassination attempt was made on the Chancellor, and Coruscant is under high alert.  The three arrive and race off to protect Valorum, and encounter Darth Maul for the first time.  Qui-Gon and Maul duel in the halls, while Obi-Wan and Anakin go to protect the Chancellor.  Qui-Gon and Republic officers fend off Maul, who retreats into a spaceship and flies off.  Too worried about the Chancellor to pursue the Sith Lord, Qui-Gon joins his apprentices.

At the Jedi Temple, Qui-Gon reports on this to Masters Yoda and Mace Windu, who decide to launch an investigation on the matter.  Palpatine suggests that Obi-Wan (whom he believes will be the next great Sith Lord) should be the one who the Jedi send out while Jinn and Skywalker go to his home planet of Alderaan to hide the Chancellor, to which they agree.  Obi-Wan is sent to track down the Sith Lord, while Qui-Gon and Anakin are assigned to protect both Valorum and Padme. Along the way to Alderaan, Anakin and Padme begin bonding.

Darth Sidious holds a meeting with Dooku and Nute Gunray, telling them that the Jedi are now on the hunt for Darth Maul.  Gunray fears that the investigation will lead to their base of operations on Geonosis, but Dooku reassures Gunray that Kenobi isn't smart enough or strong enough to outwit Maul.  After Gunray signs off, Dooku is anointed Darth Tyranus and tells the Count to begin construction on the droid armies they have established.

On Alderaan, Anakin and Padme begin to form a powerful relationship, learning more about each other and how young Skywalker was taken from his home planet of Tatooine, but still remembers his mother well enough.  Qui-Gon discovers in Palpatine's library, a prophecy indicating that there will be a Jedi powerful enough to vanquish the Sith from the galaxy and restore order to the galaxy:

Born in oppression

Raised in honors

He will rise 

The one with the power to destroy the dark

He will fall into doubt

But will rise over it all

And through it all

Shall bring a balance to the Force

  He gives Anakin a test of his abilities that night, and begins to think Anakin may be the Chosen One in the prophecy.  But he decides to keep it a secret, out of fear of the Sith learning about it.

Obi-Wan travels to Iridonia, and discovers Maul's old village.  A Zabrak shaman reveals that a "hooded monster" swept into their village and abducted her son.  Obi-Wan reports to Master Yoda, who sends him to where his tracking device last went: Serenno.

Valorum confides in Qui-Gon that he fears that a someone inside the Senate has planned both the coup and the assassination attempt on his life.  Padme bursts into the room, telling them that according to the Holonet, Geonosis, Malastare, and Ansion have already seceded from the Republic.  Through a recorded message, Dooku warns the Senate (now under the temporary control of Palpatine) that if the Republic does not agree to conform to his reform demands, he and his droid armies will rip the Republic in half.  he also warns the Jedi to stay out of the conflict, stating that they aren't prepared for what they will face.  Valorum fears his inaction on Alderaan is causing the massive secession and the trio begins to contemplate the worst: war.

At night, Anakin suffers through a nightmare in which his mother is being tortured by Sand People.  Anakin asks Qui-Gon to leave for Tatooine, but Qui-Gon tells him that the Jedi are to leave their families behind.  Anakin walks off, saying that he had always considered Qui-Gon to be his father.  Anakin decides to run away, but Padme blackmails him into joining the runaway Jedi.  The two depart with her family droid, R2-D2, to Tatooine.

Obi-Wan arrives on Serenno, but is shot down above Dooku's Manor.  He is captured and locked away in the dungeon.  Dooku begins to play to Kenobi's weaknesses, telling him that his drive to find Darth Maul will eventually send him into the Dark Side.  He offers Obi-Wan the chance to become his pupil,but Obi-Wan refuses.  Dooku decides to jettison Kenobi into space, but the young Jedi manages to steal Dooku's old lightsaber and escapes on a ship and departs to find Qui-Gon.

Sidious and Tyranus meet to discuss their affairs.  Sidious tells Dooku to start their plans to conquer the galaxy by invading Alderaan, citing the Republic's inability to act in a state of crisis.

Anakin and Padme arrive in Mos Eisley and meet up with Anakin's old neighbor, Owen Lars.  Lars explains that his father and Shmi Skywalker married a few years ago and they have lived in Anakin's old house for years.  They also sadly inform him that Shmi was kidnapped by the Sand People a week ago and his father and the town police still haven't found her.  Anakin asks Padme to remain with Owen, while he goes alone. 

Owen, realizing that Padme really cares for Anakin, gives her his speeder bike to find him.  She scours the desert to find him, discovering a fire at the village.  Anakin, blinded by his rage and hatred, wipes out virtually the entire Tusken Village.  Padme begs for him to stop, ultimately reaching his good side by hugging him.  Anakin bursts into tears and Padme comforts him.

The Confederacy arrives on Alderaan and attacks the city of Naboo.  Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan reunite while rallying the Alderaan Guard and Gungan soldiers (minus Jar Jar Binks) to fight off the droid armies.  Anakin and Padme receive the message about the invasion and return to Alderaan to help.  Sidious contacts Darth Maul and sends him to Alderaan to "wipe them out", telling his apprentice that he will be on Alderaan within the hour to take what is rightfully his.  

The ensuing Battle of Alderaan is mostly a ground theater, having an army of combat droids battling volunteers and the Jedi throughout the city.  Though outnumbered, the Jedi and their allies fend off the droids and actually take the offensive, until Maul arrives and draws the attention of the Jedi.  Qui-Gon orders Anakin back into the palace with Valorum until a wave of droids separates Master and Apprentice, causing Anakin and Padme to have to fight along with their friends on Alderaan.

Maul and Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan duel throughout the Palace.  When the duel reaches the same room as the battling between droids and heroes, Obi-Wan sees Anakin take a laser bolt in the arm for Padme, injuring him.  Obi-Wan broke away from the fight with Maul to tend to Anakin, but in the process, allows Qui-Gon to be killed by Maul.  With Qui-Gon's death, the heroes rally to fight Maul, but the Sith escapes once again, leaving his Battle Droid hordes to be eradicated by the remaining soldiers.

Valorum, safely ensconced in a secret chamber, is suddenly confronted by Darth Sidious.  Sidious reveals himself to his old friend as Palpatine and he torments the Chancellor before executing him, whispering in his ear, "And so fell the Republic..."

Valorum's death is depicted by many as the completed assassination by Darth Maul, who now links directly to Count Dooku and the Confederacy, prompting acting Chancellor Palpatine to declare war on the Confederacy.  After Valorum and Qui-Gon's respective burials and cremations, Obi-Wan takes Anakin as his apprentice and prepares to leave the planet, but not before Padme kisses Anakin for the first time and thanks him for rescuing her.

On Geonosis, the three Sith Lords meet, with Sidious as a hologram.  Though angry at Maul for killing his old apprentice, Dooku insists that Qui-Gon would have been a hindrance to their plans moving forward.  Maul volunteers to lead the fighting and leaves, prompting Dooku and Sidious to remark about his usefulness but ultimate wasted potential.  Sidious informs Dooku that they should keep a close eye on Kenobi and Skywalker, both of whom could be useful...